Samantha: 109 Months, Week 4
Aedan: 76 Months, Week 1
Owen: 33 Months, Week 4
With our new arrival on Saturday afternoon, we figured most of this week would be about survival and trying to fit a baby's needs into the life of our family. I was definitely thankful that we got this placement during the summer when I could have more time to adjust with Ben being home a little bit more to help out when needed.
We had thought about maybe hosting or attending a micro-gathering on Sunday morning, but with our newborn, that was definitely not going to happen. We watched church with Neil and just kind of hung out for the morning before he left that afternoon.
Samantha was really excited to pick out a cute outfit for our new baby that day. She got this adorable outfit that Samantha actually wore the day we brought her home from the hospital, and she even picked out a cute little pink bow headband for her hair. I wish I could include pictures of her face, but this little girl was super cute, and she was so small that she was swimming in the newborn sized outfit. Here are some pictures of her dressed up that morning.
Owen was very excited to see her and touch her as well. He was so gentle and kind with her; it was sweet to see him interact with a baby. I used to think he was so small because he was my baby, but in comparison to our new little girl, he looked so big and grown up!
I put Owen down for his nap that afternoon so that Ben could spend more time talking with Neil before he had to leave. Here he is fast asleep on my lap. I know these moments and days are fleeting where he wants to cuddle with me to fall asleep. He is getting so big that he barely fits on my lap anymore. Since I know this time will soon end, I often take pictures of him sleeping, just in case it's the last time and I didn't even know it. He just looks so calm and peaceful, and very adorable when he's sleeping like this. I will never regret cuddling with my children until they fall asleep. These are precious moments that I will never get again.
She was definitely still in the sleepy newborn phase, and it seemed like no matter how much we tried to keep her awake for a little while after she ate, she would fall asleep pretty much wherever she was: on the floor, in a bouncy seat, or in our arms. I just love her tiny little legs.
Here he is laying in bed after I put him down.
Just to get a little perspective on how small our little baby is, here she is in our little baby chair. So tiny, and so sleepy!
I put Owen to bed that night as well, and he wanted me to take silly pictures of him in bed again. I have no idea why he thinks this is so funny, but he laughs so hard at the bright flash in his room with the light turned off. He has such a wonderful, silly sense of humor.
The weekend was going pretty well with getting used to having a newborn in our house. We set up a pack and play with the newborn insert in it to raise it up higher and make it easier to set her in it. We were also able to attach the changing table to the top of that, which made it all compact. My friend, Grace, let me borrow a glider chair to keep in our room, since we still use the glider with Owen right now. Another friend, Melissa, brought a rock and play for us to use as well for another sleeping option, and another friend and fellow foster parent brought us a bunch of Dr. Brown bottles to use since they help with gas. That was the brand we had used with our kids as well, but we only had four bottles, which wasn't going to be enough for an exclusively bottle-fed baby, so we were glad to borrow these bottles from her. We were appreciative of all the initial help and support in getting adjusted to this new addition to our family.
We are big proponents of swaddling babies, and these Velcro swaddles make the process so much easier. We have saved all our stuff from when our kids were babies and beyond so that we can be prepared for any age foster child, so we had a lot of swaddle wraps to pull out. Especially since this girl was 3 weeks and 2 days early, she will enjoy being wrapped up tight even more than our kids did since she is "younger." I decided to take the picture of her wrapped up and happily sleeping. This was after 8:30 a.m., and she was still fast asleep. It was nice that she would sleep in more in the morning, giving Ben and I a chance to get up, showered, and ready, make and have breakfast with the kids, as well as get them started on their day and get Owen dressed as well. It would be nice if Ben and I could sleep in a little more too, but with three other kids that are up by 7:00 every day doesn't leave us with that choice.
Everyone is pretty smitten with his adorable little girl we are taking care of, but Samantha is particularly sweet and loving with her. She picks out her outfit every day, and she is always willing to hold her and give her a bottle. I love the following pictures of Samantha holding her: the smile on her face, the gentle way she cradles her, and her excitement for finally having the baby sister she has always wanted. It makes me proud to see how well she take to the responsibilities of being a big sister and how eager she was for us to get another foster placement. She is definitely "all in" with us in this and is super helpful. She is great with little kids.
Here is our little girl wrapped up and sleeping in the swing. She enjoys sleeping there as I think the rocking movement and the upright position helps her to feel more comfortable.
Taking a foster placement is always really busy at the beginning because you have more appointments and visits and the initial placement hearing as well. The hearing for our little girl was Monday at 12:30 via conference call, due to COVID. We were told we would be able to listen in to the hearing, but once we called in, we were actually told that we didn't need to be present and were asked to disconnect. We thought that was a little odd, because we thought it was our right to be there, but our caseworker said that we have the right to be heard, but not necessarily to hear everything being said in a hearing. We were filled in afterwards and there wasn't too much said other than what we already knew, but we just like to be kept in the loop as much as we can be as foster parents.
Our little girl also had a follow-up appointment at the doctor that afternoon. I had plans to meet her birth mom at the doctor for the appointment, but when I arrived and texted that I was there, she called me and said that the appointment had to be cancelled because the doctor was out for a family emergency. However, no one ever called to tell me that, which was frustrating. I decided to go up to the window to reschedule her appointment, and they actually said she could still be seen, since she had to be seen in a certain number of days after being discharged from the hospital. I felt bad that her birth mom wasn't there for the appointment, but I didn't know what else I could do. Her appointment went really well. She was a tiny little thing at 6 pounds, 10 ounces which put her in the 17th percentile, 18 inches long which put her in the less than 1st percentile, and her head circumference was 34.3 cm which put her in the 43rd percentile. I had a few questions like about how many ounces of formula she should be expected to eat at a time, if the amount she was pooping was normal, and the fact that her umbilical cord had already fallen off. So she was small but doing well, and they loaded me up with formula samples to take home to tide us over until we could get her signed up for WIC where we would get the formula paid for for us.
Here I am holding our baby girl when we got home from the doctor. I thought this was a good picture because you can see how tiny she is and her dark hair, but you can't see her face, so I didn't have to block anything out. I posted a picture on Facebook and commented, "We have only had this little peanut for a few days, but we are already feeling super attached to her. The kids love her like she is their little sister and are excited for every little moment of her eyes opening and seeing her take her first bath. After seeing Ben kiss her on the head, Aedan even remarked, "I didn't know we were allowed to kiss her!" So now kissing her good night is part of our nighttime routine. It's hard loving and becoming attached to this little girl when we have no idea how long we will be blessed to have her in our family, but love and attachment is exactly what she needs right now, so that is what we will give her."
Here is our little peanut (I think that is how I will refer to her from now on in my blog), enjoying some tummy time on the Boppy pillow. Samantha and Owen enjoyed sitting next to her on the floor while they looked at books.
On Tuesday morning I decided to be brave and take all four kids out to the playground at the kids' school all by myself. Really, it's much easier with a bottle fed baby because I don't have to worry about breastfeeding in public or anything like that. Plus, our little peanut is still in the sleepy newborn phase, so she will pretty much sleep wherever she is with no problem. It was going to be a cooler, cloudier morning, so I knew it wouldn't be too hot to play on the playground, and I think Samantha and Aedan enjoyed being at their school, a place they haven't been for many months. Our little peanut fell asleep in the car seat and stayed asleep the whole time we were out. It was fun to watch the kids play together, to push them on the swings, and to find all the hidden animal shapes on the playground together. Plus, at the end of our time there, they put on a little concert for me. I don't know where they come up with these ideas! We had a fun morning together.
I included these pictures of Aedan because as I was taking a video of their song, I couldn't help but look at him and smile, just the look on his face, the seriousness of his drumming, and the way he looks back at Samantha for direction, it melts my heart. I love this shy, quiet (around people he doesn't know), sensitive, kind, thoughtful boy. I can't believe he will be starting 1st grade in the fall.
Samantha was such a big help to me on Tuesday. While I was putting Owen down for his nap, which took awhile, she sat with our little peanut and when she woke up and got fussy, Samantha tried a pacifier, and when that didn't work, she got a bottle made and fed the whole thing to her, all by herself, while I was up with Owen. She said she remembered watching me make a bottle earlier, and she remembered how many scoops to put in the bottle. Samantha is growing up right before my very eyes and can do so many things all by herself. I enjoy watching her express her independence, even though I miss the days when she was little and needed me more and would back her little bottom up into my lap to have me read her book after book.
Owen woke up slowly from his nap that afternoon. Here he is cuddling next to me on the couch that afternoon while I was trying to read my textbook for my class.
After having our little peanut for a few days, we were starting to settle into a new routine, even though it was hard getting used to being woken up several times a night, but our little peanut was a sweet baby, and our kids just love having her. She is still in the sleepy stage, and falls asleep quite often with very little awake time, but she was awake for almost two hours that evening, so that was good. We haven't seen too many effects of how she was born, and the doctor at the hospital didn't see much either, so that was good. She was eating 2 ounce bottles every time and was eating every 3 hours or so. Two out of the three nights we have had trouble settling her down between 11:30 p.m. and 1:30 a.m., but other than that, she was sleeping pretty well in the pack and play in our room, all wrapped up like a burrito in the swaddle wrap.
Wednesday was a busy morning with trying to get up and out of the house, something we haven't done too much since the stay at home order came out in the March. However, we had to be out of the house by 9:00 that morning to take our little peanut down to Wilkes-Barre. While we waited to pick her back up, the kids and I went over my friend Kaili's house to let the kids play and give moms a chance to talk for awhile. It was rainy outside, so there wasn't much of a chance to ride bikes or go to the playground as we had hoped to do. However, Samantha and Aedan disappeared into an upstairs bedroom and played with a little dollhouse, while Owen played with play-doh with the younger kids downstairs. It was fun to actually get together with people again because we haven't done this in a long time either. We didn't leave to come back home until a little before 12:30 because I had to get our little peanut, change her diaper and feed her, as well as get everyone else ready. Toting four kids around is a lot of work! Ben had an appointment for the van, so we had to be back home so he could take it in, and we just barely made it back in time.
The kids ate a little bit at Kaili's house that morning, but they still wanted a little bit of food once we got back home, so Owen didn't get down for a nap until late that day. However, he fell asleep pretty quickly in my lap, and I, of course, had to take more pictures of my sleeping little boy. I love holding him while he falls asleep.
Since we accepted this little peanut to be in our home for as long as if needed, we started thinking a little bit more toward the future and what we would do about our trip to the Midwest at the beginning of August. We could make arguments as to whether we would like to take her with us, as well arguments as to why it would be best to leave her here with friends that we trust. It would be hard to take her on that long of a road trip when our car is usually so full to begin with. Plus, we would have to stop more and potentially deal with a fussy baby who no longer wanted to be in their car seat. We figured her mom would also not like us to take a newborn on that long of trip, and she would miss one of her visits and appointments as well. Ben and I went back and forth about it for awhile and were going to take some time to think about it and consider the options.
It's always tricky to find a good time to go to the beach at Harvey's Lake because of Owen napping and then working around dinnertime and bedtime. However, we decided to make a quick trip before dinner that night, and the kids were so excited to go swimming. Here they are posing for a picture for me in front of the water, sitting on the steps that go down into the water. They definitely enjoy having access to the lake. It's such a fun place to be, and it's just minutes from our house. I'm glad that we decided to get a membership here, and I look forward to getting one every summer. It's been a fun way to get outside and have fun, while also cooling off, and doing something that the kids love. We live in such a beautiful place.
I feel like this week we largely just took it easy and allowed ourselves some grace to figure out our new life and our new state of sleep deprivation. Samantha is so excited every morning when our little peanut wakes up, and she picks out some really cute outfits and headbands for her. I know you can't see her face, but isn't she just the cutest?
Here's Owen making silly faces for me at bedtime again that night. I love how much he enjoys life and likes to laugh. It's hard to be around him for very long before he makes you laugh and smile and forget whatever was on your mind before.
With our little peanut arriving last weekend, I was definitely finding it difficult to find time to do work for my class, so Ben stayed home with the kids on Friday so I could go work in the peace and quiet of the library.
Ben took these adorable pictures of the boys with our little peanut. Usually it's Samantha who offers to feed her, but Aedan was really interested in helping out that day, and from what I heard, he did a great job feeding her her bottle. I have to say how handsome Aedan looks in this picture. I love his thick brown hair and his big brown eyes. He is still pretty shy, and he doesn't like to have pictures taken of him or to smile for pictures, but I just love the way he looks in this picture. He is so sweet, and I love watching him grow up and see his interests and personality develop more.
Aedan told Ben that day that he changed his mind and does want to get married and maybe have one kid. However, he wants to have foster babies. Apparently he likes our little peanut more than he lets on. It's pretty cool how much our kids have attached and love our little peanut, just in the short week that we have had her so far. Even Owen was cuddling up next to her on his floor when I had her up there and was getting Owen dressed for the day. He said he likes having her in our house. She is definitely getting a lot of love from this household!
I went to the library to work on my big assignment so I could sit in air conditioning, and the internet kept cutting in and out that afternoon, making it really hard to do my work because I don't have Microsoft Word on my computer, so I have to use Google Docs to type my assignments. I ended up not getting as much done as I was hoping for and left the library feeling a little discouraged.
That night I just felt tired. The lack of sleep was catching up with me, I think. It was just hard because I still had to be able to think to work on my class work, which is hard when I'm tired. Also, when I'm tired I snap at the kids a lot more and lost my patience a lot easier, which I don't like doing. When you are pregnant your body kind of prepares you during the last couple months with getting up to go to the bathroom and being woken up by your baby kicking and moving, but in this instance, this was me sleeping through the night to abruptly waking up multiple times a night. Ben and I take turns, which is nice because with our kids it was always on me since I was nursing. Our little peanut wakes up about every 2 1/2 hours at night, but seems to be able to make it closer to 3 hours during the day sometimes. She can usually finish her 2 ounce bottle in 10-15 minutes, which is pretty good, and I try to keep her awake and have her eat as much as possible before she falls back asleep again. Last night she was uncomfortable for awhile because she was trying to poop, so she was unsettled for awhile until she did that. Overall though, she just eats and goes right back to sleep, so it's not too bad so far. Things will obviously change over time, and she will slowly transition to waking up less often, it's just hard with having three kids of our own because we don't really have the luxury of sleeping in or even taking a nap if we're tired because our kids are up and out of their rooms by 7:15 every day, and most afternoons are taken up by other things going on, or it would just be too noisy or distracting to sleep. So sometimes I just feel like I'm in a fog most of the day. Our little peanut is super cute though, and we knew this would be challenging going into it. We feel blessed to be able to care for her and love her while her mom takes the time to work on the things she needs to do in order to get her baby back.
On Saturday, July 11th, I was feeling a little ambitious for only having our little peanut for a week, but I just really wanted to get out of town and go do something fun. Ben and I looked around for awhile on Friday night because so many things are partially or fully closed down due to COVID. We ended up deciding to drive up to Binghamton, New York, stopped at a playground for the kids to play and picked up lunch at Wendy's to eat at a picnic table, while waiting for the museum to open. Here are the kids riding on a double swing with Owen. They thought it was so fun that they were fighting with each other over who could ride on the swing with him first. I guess that's a good problem to have, right?
From there we went to the Roberson Museum and Science Center. We knew it wouldn't be too thrilling, but it was pretty cheap, and they had some exhibits we thought would interest the kids. They had a model train display that the kids looked at for quite awhile. They had a few exhibits on animals and history, which Samantha found more interesting than the boys. Our little peanut drank her bottle shortly after getting there, and then I just held her in my arms as we walked around the museum, looked at the exhibits, and explained things to the kids. It really was a fun day. We were pretty much the only ones there, so we didn't have to worry about social distancing, and it was a good break in our change of pace of largely just staying around Wilkes-Barre. The kids' favorite part of the museum was the old, restored mansion connected to it. They loved exploring the old rooms, thinking about what they could have been used for, and imagining what life would be like if they lived in a house like that.
We had a fun day, and everyone did a great job listening and being respectful. It was good to see that we were capable of still going on family outings together and surviving, even with a newborn in tow.
And to end my post, here are a few more silly bedtime pictures of little Owen.
(Blog about July 5-11, 2020)
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