Samantha's 3rd Birthday!

Samantha: 36 Months, Week 1
Aedan: Week 3

This past week was super busy for our family with a doctor appointment, me getting sick, Ben's conference at IU, Samantha's 3rd birthday, and a visit from my Grandma, Don, and my brother Matt.  Wow, that's a lot for one week, no wonder I feel pretty tired right now.

But first, here are a few cute sleepy baby pictures.  Aedan makes some of the most wonderfully adorable faces.  I love just watching him sleep. :)

On Tuesday we decided to take a family trip to the library.  I didn't think I was quite up for taking both Samantha and Aedan by myself yet, and Ben didn't have anything he needed to be on campus for, so he offered to go with us, to make things easier in dealing with two kids.  However, even though we made the effort to get there for story time, when we got to the library we discovered that story time is cancelled until July 1 due to library renovations.  Nevertheless, we stayed and played for about an hour before finally heading home.  Once home, Samantha was acting very emotional, crying about nothing, and we decided to have an early lunch and get her down for a nap because she was acting so very tired.  Apparently food was all she needed, she ate a lot for lunch and then acted much more Samantha-like.  Aedan did a great job on his first trip to the library, nursing while we were there, and then just looking around at everything as Ben carried him around.  Ben then went to campus that afternoon to get some work done, and he had a meeting a 4:00 that lasted for an hour and a half, so he picked up Five Guys for dinner on his way home.  (We haven't felt much like cooking lately, just don't seem to have the energy for that yet.)  Samantha was being particularly ornery that afternoon since she didn't take a nap and was very tired.  I was trying hard to not lose my patience even though Aedan was also being unusually needy.  I think he is changing his sleeping habits a bit.  The past two weeks we were able to just lay him in he swing and he would fall fast asleep, and he will still do that, but now, it seems like he prefers to be held and rocked or bounced until he falls asleep, then you are usually able to transfer him into the swing or other place so you can eat dinner or take care of Samantha.

On Wednesday I invited my friend, Meagan, and her son, James, over for a play date.  It was going to be a rainy, dreary day, so I figured it would be nice to have some company, but still be able to stay in our own home.  She and I had a good time talking, and Samantha really enjoyed being around James, who is about 4 1/2 months old.  She has gotten very lovey lately, wanting to give Aedan lots of hugs and kisses, wanting to touch him and squeeze him and get her hair all up in his face.  She was doing similar things to James when he was over.  There were several times that I had to tell her to give him space, and the same thing goes for Aedan at times.  She loves her baby brother so much, so much that sometimes she is smothering with her affection.  However, I am not going to discourage it.  I would much rather see her initiate acts of love and affection towards her little brother rather than acts of anger or jealousy.  They seem to be developing a very positive, wonderful relationship with each other.  

That afternoon, after lunch, we had a doctor's appointment scheduled as a 3 year checkup for Samantha and a 2 week checkup for Aedan.  However, since Samantha was still two days away from being three, they were unable to do Samantha's checkup because Medicaid wouldn't cover it.  Aedan did pretty well at the doctor, not really getting upset until we had to get him dressed again at the end.  His weight was 9 pounds, 12 ounces, in the 75th percentile.  His height was 22 inches, in the 95th percentile.  His head circumference was >>>>>.  I asked Dr. Esarey about the little bumps he had developed on his forehead and cheeks at the beginning of the week, and he said it is just a normal newborn rash and will go away on its own.  He said there was no need to put anything on it and recommended that we just use water when we wash it (which we do anyways) in case the soap may irritate it some.  He also called in a prescription for a Vitamin D drop that we are to give him every day as long as I am solely breastfeeding.

Here are some pictures of our sleepy little boy in the afternoon on Wednesday, after a busy time at the doctor.

Throughout the evening on Wednesday, I started to feel really sick.  I was really cold and kept having the chills, which was strange.  I started feeling really worn down and didn't have much energy at all.  Then, I decided to take my temperature and it was right around 100 degrees.  On my discharge paperwork from the hospital, it said to call Dr. Crooke if my temperature was anything above 100.4, so I decided not to take any medicine and to take my temperature again later to see if it had gone up at all.  I wasn't sure if I had caught some sort of bug or if something else was going on, like a fever related to engorgement, and I didn't want Aedan to catch anything from me, so I put Samantha to bed and let Ben hang out with Aedan for awhile.  However, I kept feeling more and more lousy, so after I got her in bed, I took my temperature again and it was over 101 degrees, so I decided it was time to call Dr. Crooke.  I always hate having to call the emergency answering service during non-office hours because I hate to bother Dr. Crooke at home at night, but I didn't want anything more severe to develop, and I certainly didn't want to get Aedan sick.  He called back pretty quickly, asked me some questions, and said it sounded like I may have a breast infection, mastitis, since there wasn't much else that would cause me to get that sick that fast and give me such a high fever.  I was surprised to hear that because I also got mastitis when nursing Samantha, but I had very, very severe pain and could see/feel a hard, red place on my breast, a clear indication of mastitis.  This time, however, I did not have that at all, just a slight feeling of engorgement earlier in the day.  Dr. Crooke called in a prescription of antibiotics for me to start taking and wanted me to call and make an appointment to come into the office to see him the next day.  So, Ben headed out to pick up my prescription, having to drive all the way across town to the only pharmacy that is open 24 hours.  He was so tired and exhausted from a long day, and I felt bad that he was then having to take care of me, getting no down time to just relax.  I went to bed that night feeling pretty lousy, still feeling hot and sweaty and having chills.  I hoped that the antibiotics would kick in quickly, making me feel better the next day.  To make things worse, Wednesday night was rough for Aedan, which was hard because Ben had a very busy day on Thursday with the conference starting at IU that he has been planning for so many months.  It seemed like Aedan would nurse, I would lay him down, and then 5-10 minutes later he would be up, acting like he was hungry again.  Then, he developed the hiccups, which made him upset and kept him up, so Ben lovingly took Aedan downstairs for about an hour so that I could get some rest since I wasn't feeling well.  He came back upstairs around 6:30 because Aedan was getting hungry and kept trying to eat his shirt, and then Ben just got up and got ready for the day, knowing that Samantha would be waking up around 7:00.

At night we wrap Aedan up in a swaddle wrap to keep him snug, warm, and happy.  Babies are so cute all wrapped up like little burritos, so I just had to take a picture of our little boy, wrapped up, and fast asleep in his little bassinet next to our bed.

Ben had a busy morning ahead of him with the start of the conference, and since I wasn't sure how I would be feeling when I woke up Thursday morning, I decided to have Samantha go over to Meredith's house to play with Zeke so that I didn't have to watch both her and Aedan in the morning when I wasn't feeling well and Ben having to be on campus all day.  She volunteered to come and get Samantha, which was really nice of her.  I was feeling somewhat better in the morning, but was glad to have Samantha entertained by someone else, especially because Aedan was being a little more fussy than usual, was not wanting to be put down, and was having trouble settling down for sleep.  I was at least able to get Aedan to sleep long enough to take a shower and eat some breakfast.

After changing Aedan's diaper one time that morning, I took a little video of his newborn movements, kicking his legs back and forth, moving his arms in little circles, as well as the noises he makes that we call his "squawks."  It's nice to be able to look back and see and hear what your baby was like as a newborn.  It's so easy to forget, and I want to capture these special moments while I can.

Samantha was dropped back off at home around 1:00, after eating lunch with Meredith and her family.  I got a good report about her behavior, and then Samantha and I sat and read books for awhile, waiting for Upland Grandma to arrive.  I figured it would be easier if she got to see and play with Grandma for awhile instead of knowing she would arrive during her nap.  It was wonderful that Grandma was able to come down and help me while Ben worked at his conference.  Especially with not feeling 100%, I would not have been able to do it without her.  Grandma put Samantha down for her nap, but unfortunately, no napping happened that day, having visitors at our house is just too exciting sometimes.

I had my appointment with Dr. Crooke scheduled at 2:30 that afternoon, so after changing Aedan's diaper and nursing him, we headed out together.  He fell asleep quickly in the car and stayed asleep during the whole appointment and getting some groceries afterwards, which I was grateful for.  Dr. Crooke confirmed that I did indeed have mastitis, but guessed that we probably caught it early enough before it developed and got worse.  He encouraged me to continue taking my antibiotics so that we could ensure it wouldn't flare back up and get worse.

Grandma was just getting Samantha out of bed when I got back around 4:00, and then we had a fairly good evening together.  Samantha was a bit more irrational than usual since she didn't nap, but she wasn't too bad.  Grandma and Samantha played outside for awhile, and then Grandma made dinner for us.  It was wonderful to have all this help around the house.  I was exhausted by the end of the night, particularly since Aedan continued to be a little more fussy than usual, wanting to be with me more than others.  Ben arrived home a little before 10:00, and I was upstairs trying to get Aedan to fall asleep.  He had been awake since like 4:30 that afternoon, and we knew he was tired, but he just would not let himself fall asleep.  We were hoping this would not be a reflection of our night's sleep, with him having all that awake time.  Luckily, he did a really good job sleeping that night, waking up, nursing, and going back to sleep, just like he usually does.  Around 4:30 am though, he woke up and was as alert as could be, I tried various things to get him to go back to sleep and stay asleep, but nothing seemed to work and he would be "squawking," as we call it, ten minutes later.  Eventually, probably around 6:30 or so, I decided to just bring him into bed with us to see if that would do any good.  (You just keep trying things as a parent until something works, right?)  Doing that seemed to make him happy, he got all snuggled up and went right back to sleep without a problem.  Maybe he was just cold?  Maybe he just wanted to be close to us?  Who knows?!  Babies are such a mystery sometimes.

Friday, May 16, was a big day because it was Samantha's 3rd birthday!  I put up a banner and had some balloons waiting for her when she came downstairs in the morning, even though we weren't going to celebrate it until Saturday since Daddy was going to be busy on campus all day again.  When Daddy and I went into her room that morning, she looked at us and asked, "Is today my birthday?"  She beamed from ear to ear.  I love that we get to celebrate this day with her, a day to make her feel special.  We went downstairs together so we could see the look on her face when she saw the birthday decorations.  It was pretty adorable, and we got a cute picture of her that morning, on the day our little girl turned three years old.  Wow, I can't believe she's been a part of our family for that long already.  It's pretty amazing.  She is such a special girl, has such a sweet, caring personality, and is already developing quite the sense of humor.  We love her so much.

We decided to do a couple special things for Samantha's birthday that day, so once we all got ready and Aedan got his tummy full, we headed out to the mall to take a birthday ride on the train, just like we did for her birthday last year.  However, when we got there, we discovered the train driver would not be back until 1:00, so we decided to go eat lunch at Chick-fil-a first, let Samantha play on the indoor play area, and then go back to the mall to ride on the train.  She was very excited to ride the train, although it wasn't quite as enthralling to her as it was last year when she was only two.  

Samantha had a good time doing some special things that morning (and best of all, Aedan slept in his car seat the whole time we were out!), even though she was rather tired from not getting enough sleep over the past couple of days.  Luckily, we got her to take a good nap that afternoon, after I went upstairs and had to be rather stern with her.  We were so glad she took a nap because she would have been pretty crabby that night otherwise.  After her nap she was able to watch a show, play outside, and stay up late with Grandpa and Grandma.  She was in a cheerful, silly mood at dinner.  Then we had bath time for her, bath time for Aedan, Daddy got home from campus, and it was time for me to finish decorating Samantha's birthday cake.  Wow, what a busy day!  It's amazing how wonderful it was to see Ben again when he had been gone since 7:00 am.  It's nice that he was doing work for this conference because he was making $20 an hour, but this weekend, with him being gone so much, was sure hard on me.

On Saturday, once Daddy got back from the conference at IU, we were going to celebrate Samantha's birthday with Grandpa and Grandma before they would have to leave to go back to Upland.  Our morning together was pretty laid back with plenty of time to hang out.  The weather was a bit cool, but Samantha got some good outdoor time playing and going on walks with Grandpa and Grandma.  Aedan was still having a bit harder of a time falling asleep.  It took some work of walking around or bouncing him, and I even broke down and used a pacifier.  I was going to wait for longer before possibly using one because doctors always tell you to wait until breastfeeding is firmly established or until about one month old.  Also, we never really used a pacifier with Samantha so it seems weird to use one with Aedan.  We tried one with Samantha but she never took to it, she would just automatically spit it out.  Sometimes we would use it to get her to fall asleep, but that was about it.  For some reason I just felt guilty about introducing it already, like I was going to make him become dependent on it or that I would use it just as a way to make him "be quiet."  However, it really seemed to work for him.  I had just nursed him, so I knew he wasn't hungry.  He had been awake for awhile, so I knew he was just tired and needed to let himself fall asleep.  Sucking on the pacifier helped to soothe him enough to get him to fall asleep, rather than always using nursing with me to put him to sleep.  It's nice because using the pacifier also allows other people to participate in pacifying him, giving me a bit of a break occasionally.

Here are a couple of other observations about Aedan from the past couple days.  Obviously, as growing babies tend to do, he is getting bigger, but he is in between sizes as far as clothes go.  Newborn clothes, especially the onesies are too small and too tight on him.  However, the 0-3 month clothes we have are all too big for him, it's like he's swimming in them.  We also have decided to officially move up to size 1 diapers rather than newborn.  We were reaching the end of a package of newborn diapers and didn't want to open another one because we knew he'd be getting too big for them sometime really soon.  Also, especially at night, he has been filling his diapers quite a bit, they get very wet and have leaked a couple times.  Hopefully moving to the next diaper size up will help solve that problem as it is never fun to change clothes, wrap, and bassinet sheet in the middle of the night when everyone involved would rather be sleeping (or nursing in Aedan's case.)

Samantha took a really good nap for us on Saturday, which was good because we had her birthday celebration ahead of us that night.  We let her watch some of a Max and Ruby DVD that we got from the library and then we headed out to Samantha's restaurant of choice, Chipotle.  What other 3 year old would choose Chipotle as their favorite restaurant?  Apparently the kid's meal quesadilla, rice, beans, and chocolate milk are just that good.  But hey, we're not going to complain because she could be choosing McDonald's or something like that.  At least she has good taste!  After eating dinner, we went back home to open presents and have cake.

Aunt Jeni got me a cake decorating kit for Christmas, which I had yet to use, and she told me about a castle cake design in the instruction booklet that came along with the cake decorating kit.  So, I figured since Samantha likes princesses so much this year, I would take a crack at making this castle cake.  We asked Samantha what flavor cake she would like and she requested strawberry, so that's what we made for her.  (Grandma lovingly helped me bake the cake and mix together the buttercream icing on Friday during one of the times when Aedan was being fussy and only wanted me to hold him.)  I changed the design of the cake a little bit because they also added doors and windows around the outside of the cake and used a different type of candy for decorations, but I think it turned out pretty well, especially from a novice cake decorator.  Samantha enjoyed it, and I had fun making it, so that's all that really matters anyways.

Samantha couldn't wait to have us sing "Happy Birthday" to her so she could blow out her candle.  We sang her "Happy Birthday" several times on Friday and Saturday.  In fact, on Friday night as Grandpa, Grandma, Samantha, and I sat down for dinner, Samantha suggested that we just sing "Happy Birthday" as our prayer that night.  She said, "Happy Birthday is pretty much like a prayer."  So, that's what we did.  It was hilarious and special, she was just so excited that it was her birthday.

After eating cake, it was time to open presents.  Mommy and Daddy got Samantha the board game Candy Land, as well as a few Thomas the train cars.

After opening her train cars, we tried to get Samantha to guess what else she needed so that she could drive the train cars, so Grandpa had her come out to their car to see the train set box that he had in his trunk.  She was very excited and couldn't wait to get it inside, open it up, and start playing with it.

I helped Samantha get the Thomas train car characters out of their packages while Daddy and Grandpa helped to set up a little bit of a track for Samantha to play with.  She had a wonderful time and was so excited to have her very own train set, just like the ones she loves to play with at the library.  They even have instructions on different configurations of tracks you can build, so we will have a lot of fun with this present in the years to come.  Thank you Grandpa and Grandma for the wonderful birthday present!

After playing with the trains for quite a while, she decided it was time to play Candy Land, so we played a quick game together before Grandpa and Grandma had to leave to go back home.  (And where, might you ask, was Aedan during all of these birthday celebrations?  Well, he fell asleep in his car seat on our way to eat at Chipotle and slept the rest of the time until I got him out so that Grandpa and Grandma could say good bye to him before they left.)  It was nice to be able to have a night totally focused on Samantha and making her feel special.  Occasionally, I feel a bit left out from doing things with and for Samantha because having a newborn requires a lot from me, especially since I am his only food source.  It was a great birthday celebration, and we were glad that Grandpa and Grandma could be there to celebrate with us.

Sunday morning, since we don't have our ACG anymore, we decided to have a more relaxing morning and just go to second service.  It was a big Sunday for Samantha because she was able to move up to the 3 year old room!  She was a bit hesitant in going in, but she recognized many of the kids and warmed up quickly.  Aedan did pretty well in church with us.  He slept for awhile, looked around the sanctuary for awhile, and then got hungry so I took him in the back and nursed him so I could continue to listen to and participate in the service.  I tried to go back to our seats after that, but he was a bit too alert and also needed a diaper change, so Ben, once again, offered to take him for me so that I could have a little break and listen to the sermon in peace.  Ben had a bit of trouble getting Aedan to fall asleep as he walked him around the church.  Aedan seems to have already reached the point where he won't necessarily just fall asleep anywhere.  He gets too distracted by lights and seeing new things.  Ben couldn't get him to fall asleep until he took him into a dark, quiet room.  Uh oh, do we have another extrovert on our hands?  Is Aedan going to be like Samantha in that regard?

Ben and I were pretty tired that morning, so we took advantage of Aedan sleeping in his car seat and Samantha being in her room for nap time (even though she did not sleep at all), and we took a nap ourselves, feeling much better and more alive after getting some good sleep.  The weather was just beautiful that day, so after eating a delicious dinner brought to us by a kind lady from ECC, we went out on the B-line trail for a family walk.  Aedan slept peacefully in his car seat attached to the stroller, and Samantha had fun walking over the bridge and being silly with her Daddy.  It was wonderful to get out and enjoy some fresh air and a change of scenery.

Monday we had more visitors coming to Bloomington: my Grandma, her husband Don, and my brother Matt.  They were just staying for one night, Grandma and Don stayed in a hotel, and Matt stayed in Aedan's room for the night.  Their visit was short, just over 24 hours, but it was good to see them and they enjoyed being able to meet and hold Aedan.

It was kind of funny because when they arrived at our place, both our children were fast asleep, so we all just sat around and talked while waiting for them to wake up.  Samantha had a really good afternoon nap after a morning of playing at home with trains and running some errands around Bloomington.  Aedan was taking a good nap in his swing, so much so that I ended up just getting him out in an attempt to wake him up so that I could nurse him before we went out for dinner.  My Grandma suggested going to Bob Evans for dinner, and even though it was probably a little risky going to a sit down restaurant with a 3 year old and a 3 week old, we figured we could at least try it.  Luckily, we had a carrot to dangle in front of Samantha if she was respectful at dinner because the hotel they were staying at had a pool, and we said she could go swimming after dinner if she was a good listener at dinner.  Even though we were at the restaurant for quite a while, and Samantha gobbled down her food faster than any of the adults, she really did a good job waiting patiently for everyone else to finish.  Aedan did a good job as well, sleeping in his car seat for part of the time, getting his diaper changed, hanging out with Daddy for awhile, and then just enjoying being held while sucking on his pacifier.  Ben was pretty nervous about going out to eat with everyone at a sit down restaurant, but afterwards he commented to me that it went better than he thought and it made him think that maybe we could do it again, just the four of us.

After dinner we went over to the hotel so Samantha could swim with Daddy while the rest of us sat on the patio outside the pool area, enjoying the pleasant evening.  I would have loved to join Samantha and Daddy in the pool, but Aedan was hungry and needed to nurse when we got to the hotel.  Samantha had a wonderful time swimming.  She even squealed with excitement as she came out of the bathroom in her bathing suit, heading right for the pool.  Our little girl is a little fish who loves water, and she was so glad to be able to go swimming again.

I have to share one more cute story about the kind of conversations we have with Samantha.  On our way back from Chipotle when we were celebrating Samantha's birthday, she looked up at the clouds and asked, "Is God in the clouds?"  "How do we get to heaven?"  So Ben and I tried to explain to her how you get to heaven by believing in God and asking Jesus to be in your heart.  We then tried to explain to our little 3 year old how we believe in God even though we can't see Him.  Whenever we have conversations like this with Samantha, it makes me so excited for the day when she finally asks Jesus into her heart, becoming part of God's family.  That day will be so exciting, more exciting than a birthday celebration ever will be.

Getting Used to Life with a Newborn & A Visit from Chicago Grandparents

Samantha: 35 Months, Week 4
Aedan: Week 2

This blog post begins with Aedan's second week of life outside the womb.  Now, Tuesdays are normally our day to go to story time at the library, but I was in no position to take Samantha, plus Aedan didn't need to go to the library at one week old.  I had to take Aedan to an appointment that morning anyways, so Daddy volunteered to take Samantha.  She chose to wear her pink "Big Sister" shirt, which she chooses to wear almost as soon as it is clean.  They had a good time at the library and a few people noticed her shirt and that I wasn't there with her, asking her about how she likes her little brother.  The librarian telling stories was her favorite one, and they read books about the ocean.  One special book she read was an "I Spy" book, and Samantha really liked it.  They had several copies of the book spread out on the tables around the room, and Samantha told Daddy that she wanted to get that one when story was over.  (She knows she has to wait until story time is over before she can get up and choose books.)  Other kids, on the other hand, do not follow that rule, and quickly all the "I Spy" books were taken by other kids.  However, this librarian knew that Samantha wanted one, and that she was sitting and waiting respectfully, so she made sure to find another copy to give to Samantha to check out.  Those are the things that make our library so special.  The librarians take the time to care about the kids that are regular attenders of story time.  I think this librarian in particular has a special place in her heart for Samantha.

While Daddy and Samantha were at the library, I took Aedan to an appointment.  He did really well on our first real outing together by ourselves.  He fell asleep in his car seat and stayed asleep for quite awhile, giving me the opportunity to have lunch and put Samantha down for a nap easily.  Here are some pictures of my two children that afternoon right before lunch.

After taking Samantha to the library and bringing home some lunch for us, Daddy decided to head back to campus to get some work done for the afternoon.  Samantha blessed me by falling asleep right away.  I didn't hear a peep out of her, and she was probably asleep by around 1:50, which is unheard of from her lately.  Since Samantha was napping, I was going to try and take a nap too, but by the time I got things taken care of, nursed Aedan, and laid down in bed with him, Samantha woke up five minutes later.  Oh well, I guess I can't complain because at least she took a nap.  I don't think this "nap when the baby naps" thing is going to work very well with having a three year old and a newborn.  Their nap times are probably not going to coincide very often.

On Wednesday, Ben went to campus for most of the day for meetings and the final exam for his class.  So, the rest of us decided to go run an errand to the bank and then took advantage of the nice weather by playing at the park.  I nursed Aedan when we got there and then carried him in the Moby Wrap the rest of the time while he slept.  Samantha did a pretty good job listening.  Another dad helped her when she freaked out about a bug on the slide when I was nursing Aedan.  He helped her get it off so that she could continue sliding down the slide.  (It's amazing how other parents reach out to you when they see you have your hands full.)  There was only one time that I felt overwhelmed by being at the park with both Samantha and Aedan by myself.  Samantha tried to climb up a ladder that was a little too challenging for her, even though I told her not to climb it because I wasn't going to be able to come and help her while I was nursing Aedan.  However, she didn't listen to me and climbed up anyways.  Once she got to the top, she couldn't figure out how to climb from the top bar to the platform on the playground.  She was scared and shaking and upset, and I just had visions of her falling and cracking her head, causing a trip to the hospital on our first outing together with just Mommy.  So, I went over to help her climb off while still holding and nursing Aedan.  It was quite awkward and frustrating that she didn't listen to me, but at least there was only that other dad and his little boy at the park that day.  Other than that, it was a pretty uneventful trip to the park, and it gave me a sense of accomplishment in getting out of the house and doing something with both Samantha and Aedan by myself.  

We had a really good morning and a good lunch as Aedan slept away in his car seat.  However, he then woke up and needed to eat, so I nursed him while Samantha played quietly with her toys and blocks.  (She does such a wonderful job with this.  I am impressed with her ability to play independently.  It's such a blessing.)  After that it was time for a nap, which she knew about, and she went right upstairs, but for some reason she started flipping out about where her blankie was.  (We have been putting it away in her closet in the morning the last couple of days because she has grown a little too attached to it and plays with it too much, putting up a fight when we ask her to leave it in her room.)  I told her that she could give it a hug and a kiss after she got ready for her nap, but she just erupted emotionally, crying and hyperventilating, begging for her blankie.  I finally got her on the potty, but she was being silly and ended up peeing on the floor a bit because she wasn't sitting back far enough, so that caused another eruption of tears.  I ended up just taking her off the potty and cuddling her and comforting her for awhile, trying to get her to calm down.  I eventually succeeded in getting her ready for her nap, while little Aedan continued sleeping peacefully in the blue vibrating chair in his room.  Samantha crying and screaming didn't seem to phase him at all.  I guess he got used to hearing all these noises when he was in the womb.  Samantha gave blankie a hug and kiss, we read a book, and got her into bed.  I stayed in her room for five minutes, but it didn't even take the full five minutes for her to fall fast asleep.  This hasn't happened in a long time, so I could tell that she was a very tired girl.  I was so glad that she took a nap.  She slept for a good, solid two hours, giving Aedan and I lots of cuddle time together.  I love holding my little boy up against my chest, resting on the couch, listening to his little baby noises, and caressing his soft skin.  

That afternoon another meal was brought to us by a mom from church, and since Samantha took a nap, she was able to watch a show, and of course, she picked Frozen.  She is OBSESSED with this movie right now.  She also has a couple Frozen books that she reads and looks at quite a bit, too.  One of her favorite activities is to role play the movie, taking turns who is being Anna or Elsa.  It's amazing how many of the lines of the movie she has memorized.  We had to take some pictures of her watching the movie that afternoon because she had such a great expression on her face.  She is just purely delighted and full of happiness when she gets to watch her favorite movie.

We had a really good evening together as a family, playing, being silly, and without any emotional outbursts.  It's amazing what can happen when our little girl is well rested; life is much better.  Also, since Aedan had such a long nap that afternoon, he had quite a bit of awake time, probably for over two hours where we got to interact with him.  Samantha even laid in the floor gym with him, and he loved that.  He loved his big sister being up close where he could see her clearly.  Then, it was bathtime for both children, and Samantha loves watching us give Aedan a bath.  I think we are getting into this transition of a family of four pretty well.  I love seeing the two of them together.  :)

Here's our little boy sleeping soundly on the Boppy pillow, after putting himself to sleep for the night.  He's nice and clean, content and happy.

Aedan's umbilical cord fell off during the night on Wednesday.  I found it inside his wrap on his back when I was burping him during the night.  That's always an exciting thing because it's one less thing to have to be careful with when changing diapers and giving baths.  It's also one more step away from being a fresh newborn.  It's strange how much time flies, especially when you're busy with getting used to a new baby, having visitors at the house, and taking care of life as usual.

Thursday morning we decided to go to REST Stop, the last one of the year.  I figured I might as well go because it would give Samantha a chance to play with other kids, give me a break from having to entertain her, and allow me a chance to socialize with other moms while keeping Aedan close by me.  Since we all left for the morning, Ben went to campus all day to work as well.  I was pretty impressed with myself because we actually got there on time, something that didn't happen all that often when I just had Samantha to get out the door.  Aedan slept in his car seat for half the time, nursed, and then looked around for the rest of the time.  He did great on his first real outing around a group of people.

Even though Samantha was really sleepy since she woke up around 6:30 that morning, she did not go to sleep right away at nap time that afternoon, instead playing in her bed for an hour and a half.  I went up there once and caught her standing on the little guardrail of her bed, she had taken a picture decoration off the wall, and had peeled bits of paper off it.  I gave her a time out and had her get back in bed, and then, after already being in her room for so long playing, she finally fell asleep at 3:15 and we ended up having to wake her up at almost 6:00 that night.  She's so crazy!  If she would only just go to sleep right away!  

Our friend Jacob visited us for a little while that afternoon since he was in town for his dissertation defense, and then we had dinner and small group that night.  We were glad that we went tonight, even though we have a 9 day old baby, because it was our last meeting before breaking for the summer.  We will resume next August, as long as everyone continues to be interested.  Aedan did a good job, even though evenings can be difficult sometimes.  He tends to nurse a lot more in the evenings, which is fine with me because I'm sure that has to do with how well he has been sleeping at night.  The last couple of nights, it's almost as if he puts himself to sleep around 9:00.  He'll nurse and then totally conk out.  You can do anything to him, change him, move him, and he will remain sleeping.  Then, when Ben and I get ready for bed between 10:30 and 11:00, we will change Aedan's diaper, put him in pajamas, wrap him up, and I'll nurse him again.  Then, I lay him in his bassinet and he will usually wake up again sometime between 2:00 and 2:30, at which point we change his diaper and I nurse him again, laying him back in his bassinet.  Then, he will wake up again around 5:00-5:30, and we will change his diaper, I nurse him, and lay him back down again.  Those times can vary some, obviously, but overall, he is only waking up a couple times a night and is really good about going right back to sleep.  He is such a good baby with sleeping, so far anyways.  It seems like we were up throughout the night much more often with Samantha, and this could obviously change with Aedan, but so far we are pretty lucky and don't even feel like zombie parents that are totally sleep deprived.

On Friday, we had a slow morning at home with Daddy before he went to campus to get a little work done.  We had some good bonding time as a family.  I am so glad that Ben's schedule is so flexible, allowing him to have these slow mornings and to determine his own work schedule around what works for our family, especially in this time of transition with a newborn at home.  Samantha did not take a nap that afternoon, but that was okay.  And then, my parents arrived for their visit around dinner time.  We picked up some Mother Bear's to eat together and then spent the evening playing and hanging out, allowing Chicago Grandpa and Grandma to meet and hold their grandson for the first time.

Saturday morning Samantha woke up early, around 6:40, and being that she didn't nap on Friday, we had one tired girl on our hands.  It's just too exciting to sleep when there are visitors in the house.  However, she was yawning and acting sleepy by 9:00 am, and that's when you know it's going to be one of those days.  She had kind of a rough morning with being so tired, so we decided not to go anywhere.  She even got the skin on the bottom soft part of her left thumb stuck in our folding closet doors, creating much trauma, crying, and hyperventilating.  I think it took over 20 minutes for us to calm her down.  I put a band-aid over her owie, and then for the next couple of hours she held her hand completely still, not using it to pick anything up, not willing to bend it or move it in anyway.  What would happen if she actually hurt herself badly?  She can be a bit dramatic at times, especially when she hurts herself.  Thankfully, Daddy was able to calm her down by reading many, many books to her.  

Then, Grandma and Grandpa had her open her birthday presents from them: two sets of new pajamas, a Doc McStuffins t-shirt, a princess cup, and a Frozen book with a read along CD.  We also got a package from the Aeschliman's with a present for both Samantha and Aeadan, which was very sweet of them to think of us.  They got Samantha an interactive puzzle board, and they got Aedan some clothes.  It's nice that people think of getting a present for Samantha as well as Aedan so that she feels included in it all rather than jealous of the fact that Aedan is getting so many presents and she isn't getting any.  It definitely helps with the adjustment of getting used to having a little brother around.

We then picked up Wendy's and brought it home for lunch, and got Samantha down for a nap, hoping that she would take one or else our night would have been very interesting with an extremely tired girl on our hands.  She ended up falling asleep with me in the room and then slept for 2 hours and 45 minutes!  Man, she must have been a tired girl.  Since she took such a good nap, we were able to have a really good night together having dinner, watching a show, and being able to play at a park.  It was then bath time and bed time for both children, giving the adults time to relax and watch a movie together.

Aedan has such an easy disposition so far.  He loves being held, and he loves being in his swing.  He will take really long naps in his swing in the afternoon especially.  I am definitely glad that we got a nice swing like we have.  It is so helpful when I need my hands free to get lunch ready or to put Samantha down for a nap.  He is so content and happy, and really only cries when he is hungry or is tired and needs to fall asleep.  He isn't too big of a fan of baths yet either.  Friday night his Plastibell ring fell off, so we were able to submerge him more in water during this night's bath, and he seemed to like that a lot more.  It seems like as long as we keep him warm by pouring new, warm water on him, it keeps him happy, as long as we keep the baths short and sweet.  I love the smell of clean baby after bath time.  His hair is so soft and he smells so good.  Saturday night we had a pretty good night of sleeping with Aedan.  Friday night he seemed to wake up more frequently than normal, if there can be a normal with a newborn baby.  However, early Sunday morning, around 5:00 am, some bad thunderstorms rolled through and they seemed to bother Aedan some.  He was just really fidgety and squirmy, even though we had already changed his diaper and I had already nursed him.  He stayed awake in his bassinet for most of the time until the storm calmed down around 6:00.  He seemed comforted when I put my hand gently on his tummy, just so he would know someone was there and everything was okay.

Sunday was Aedan's first time to church.  We got everyone up and out of the house on time, which seemed like a miracle.  He slept through most of the beginning of the church service and then woke up wanting to eat.  I left the sanctuary to nurse him and he fell asleep, but didn't stay asleep for too long once returning to the sanctuary.  Ben offered to take him since I would have to be with him during our ACG in the next hour.  Ben walked around in the Gathering Space with Aedan, and he quickly fell asleep in his arms.  Aedan stayed asleep for awhile, waking up about halfway through our ACG, needing a diaper change and wanting to eat, so I took him to the baby nursery to take care of those things.  He then fell asleep and I was able to go back into our ACG to catch the last bit of conversation.  This was our last class for the semester, so I wanted to be a part of it as much as I could.  Aedan did such a good job for his first time at church.  Here are some cute pictures of Samantha and Aedan before church that morning.

It was also Samantha's last day in the two year old room, as she transitions to the three year old room next Sunday since her birthday is on Friday.  She has been a bit more clingy to me lately, not wanting to go into the room, or not wanting me to leave, but I think it's probably just a reaction to having a little brother now and having her world be a bit different than usual over the past few weeks.

After church, we picked up lunch at McAlister's Deli, went home to eat it, and got Samantha down for a nap.  She was, again, a very tired girl.  Daddy put her down, and she fell asleep around 2:45 without fighting at all.  After nursing Aedan, Grandpa and Grandma offered to hold Aedan for me so that I could go take a nap with Ben.  However, I always have such a hard time napping in the afternoons.  I have always been bad at napping.  Even if I feel tired, once I lay down, it's like my mind is too awake and I can't stop thinking about things, even if they aren't very important things.  I think I eventually fell asleep that afternoon, but didn't get too long of a nap in before I heard Aedan starting to cry downstairs.  My parents usually leave around 5:00 pm to head back to Chicago, but Samantha was still sleeping, so I decided to go upstairs and wake her up because she would be upset if Grandpa and Grandma left without saying good bye.  They left around 5:45, after spending some more time with her.

We then had our house back to ourselves which is good, but I always feel a sense of emptiness and loneliness when people visit and then leave, especially knowing that Monday is coming and Ben will be going back to work on campus, leaving me at home with two children.  I know that most of these feelings are probably a little of the postpartum blues, and that I have so many emotions and hormones changing in my body, but it's hard not to let myself feel that way.  Especially with everything ending for the summer, like our ACG, our small group, BSF, and Mom's REST Stop meetings, I feel kind of lost without my normal structure and routine.  I like having a certain routine to follow for the week, and we now have to discover what our new normal is going to be for the summer and with having a newborn and a three year old.  I am trying my best to keep things in perspective, to enjoy my time with Aedan, and to not get sucked into the trap of feeling like I don't have a purpose.

Sunday evening, I put Samantha to bed while Ben took Aedan out to Kroger to buy a few things that we needed for the week.  It was strange having it be just me and Samantha again.  We then got situated for the evening, Aedan nursed and fell asleep, putting himself to bed for the night, and I held him up against my chest, letting him sleep on me as Ben and I sat next to each other on the couch, watching The Amazing Race and The Good Wife, just like any other Sunday night in the past.  It was nice, and just what I needed on a day that I was feeling rather emotional.  Aedan had a really good night's sleep.  I nursed him when we got ready for bed, and he probably fell asleep around 11:15, sleeping until 3:10ish.  After a diaper change and nursing again, falling asleep around 4:00, he then slept until about 6:30.  It was amazing going through the night with really only that one wake up time.  We think it is just amazing that our little boy is already giving us these gifts of longer stretches of sleep at night.  We'll take it.  :)

The Story of Aedan's Birth and First Week of Life

Samantha: 35 Months, Week 3

Aedan: Week 1

Before I really get into writing about the life changing events of this week, I have to include a video of my little girl dancing like a ballet dancer.  We put on a leotard and ballet skirt from her dress-up clothes bin.  I found some ballet music on the computer to play for her, and this is how we spent our morning, taking turns pretending to be ballerinas.  I forgot that I had this video on my video camera, so I didn't include it in my last post.  You think she'll enjoy taking actual ballet lessons in the fall?

Last Saturday, April 26, was when our family decided to go to Indianapolis for an Indians baseball game.  Little did we know that it would be our last family outing as a family of three.  On our way home from the game, I started having contractions again.  They were consistently every 20-25 minutes for almost three hours.  They kept me awake for most of the night until I finally fell asleep around 1:45 and then I just had them sporadically.  Again, I was a bit disappointed because I was almost convinced that my labor was starting, that we would be getting up and going to the hospital rather than getting up and going to church on Sunday morning.  However, it was still a good sign because it meant that my body was gearing up for labor and that the real thing might be about to happen soon.

So, since nothing was really happening, we headed off to church, just like we normally do on Sundays.  I didn't get too many comments from people at church like, "You're still here?!"  Just a few sympathetic looks from fellow moms that know what it's like to be in the final days of pregnancy, anxiously awaiting the arrival of your baby.

We had talked several times lately about how life in a transition period is so strange.  We know this HUGE life event is about to happen where we will remember everything about it, it will be like time is standing still for awhile, it will be monumental.  All of the hopes and dreams for our family and for this little guy growing in my womb will become the beginning of our new reality.  It's such a surreal thing that when I thought about it, I would often get butterflies in my stomach.

I didn't feel too much throughout the rest of Sunday until evening came, especially after we got Samantha to bed.  My contractions started again and this time were about 15 minutes apart and continued for several hours.  Ben called his parents to let them know, especially since this was the second night in a row that I was experiencing these contractions.  We didn't think it was quite necessary for them to come down right away, since we didn't know if the contractions would continue or stop, but we gave them the information and allowed them to make the decision.  They decided they would feel better if they just came down, that way they would be here if anything happened in the middle of the night and they wouldn't have to get up and drive after having only a few hours of sleep.

Ben and I finished up a few things around the house, expecting that within the next day we would be heading to the hospital.  I continued to have contractions pretty regularly, and I continued to time them on Ben's iPhone app.  I heard Ben's parents arrive at our house around 1:15 and my contractions were still going on, making me feel glad, hoping that this might be it. :)  It's a strange feeling hoping that you will have a bad night's sleep if that means that your labor is starting.  However, similar to the night before, I fell asleep, waking up later in the morning, meaning that my contractions were not getting longer, stronger, or closer together because I was able to sleep through them.

Monday morning my contractions continued, but a bit more sporadically.  Since 7:00 when I woke up, they were about 15 minutes apart.  I was a bit disappointed because it seemed like my contractions just kept stopping and starting, and I was anxious for labor to get started and for Aedan to be born.  I didn't want this to be another false alarm, I wanted my labor to keep progressing.  I contacted my doula, Kate, and let her know what was going on.  She was such an encouragement to me, reassuring me that what I was feeling was normal, good, and promising; that little Aedan was indeed preparing to make his entrance into the world.

Since Ben's parents were here, we decided to let them hang out with Samantha so that Ben and I could go do laps around the mall, to see if I could work on getting my contractions going again.  We walked around the mall for an hour, and it seemed like the walking was working well.  My contractions were about 12 minutes apart and there were a few that were getting stronger.  Ben and I then went to eat lunch together at McAlister's Deli, and then went back to the mall to walk around some more.  That afternoon as we walked, some of my contractions were even 5-6 minutes apart, but after walking for awhile, we decided to go back home, and my contractions spread out some being more like 8-9 minutes apart.  But all of this fluctuation in my contractions made me doubt whether or not I was really in labor.  My doctor said I could go to the hospital when I had contractions anywhere between 5 and 10 minutes apart, but it was so hard for me to decide what to do.  Ben took Roscoe in to the vet to be boarded, and he was full expecting us to be heading to the hospital around dinner time, but I was so unsure and full of doubt.  I didn't want to go to the hospital too soon and have it slow down my labor or push me towards any interventions.  On the other hand, they could check my dilation and I could walk the halls, which I couldn't do at home since it was going to be dark soon.

I communicated a lot with Kate, who also talked to her supervisor, and they said that if I have to walk to bring on heavier contractions, it is probably not a sign of my cervix truly opening.  True labor is when my contractions grow longer, stronger, and closer together.  They said if I stayed home to see how things go, I should definitely rest, which to me, made me afraid that we would have a repeat of other nights where I have contractions for several hours, but then they fade away.  They said if I go to the hospital, I probably wouldn't get any sleep or rest, but I could walk the halls.  They did warn me that if I got to the hospital, checked my cervix, and saw no progression, that they would offer me Pitocin to speed things up.  They said that my best shot at an unmedicated birth is to stay home until my contractions were 5 minutes apart, at least, lasting at least a minute, and being stronger than what I was feeling then.

With Ben's parents already being at our house, and Ben and myself feeling anxious for things to get started, I felt like everyone was getting antsy in waiting.  I felt conflicted between the recommendations of the doulas to stay home and see how things progress and the anxious feelings we had of wanting to get things started and getting to the hospital.

I took another walk after dinner and my contractions were 3-4 minutes apart, but as soon as I stopped walking around, they spread out.  They were still just as intense, but just more spread out.  I was also having a lot of sharp pain when walking.  I started leaning more towards going to the hospital, but I still just wasn't convinced because my contractions were sometimes sporadic, especially once I stopped walking.  After a lot of debate, several conversations with Ben, and some crying from feeling so emotionally exhausted, we decided to head to the hospital around 9:00 pm.

We arrived at the hospital between 9:15 and 9:30, and it was such a surreal feeling, entering the labor and delivery floor, getting checked in.  Even though I had done this all before, I was just full of anxiety and trepidation for what may lie ahead.  After getting all the information they needed from me and changing into the lovely hospital gown, the nurse checked me and I was only 1 cm dilated.  I was extremely disappointed.  I thought for sure, after all the contractions I had for so long and how close together they had gotten, that I surely would have made more progress.  Kate arrived just as they were checking me, and we all decided to walk the halls for quite awhile.  Things happened similarly as they had most of the day.  My contractions grew longer, stronger, and closer together.  Some of them were quite uncomfortable, too, and I was hoping this truly was the beginning.  I had to stop periodically to be monitored and for my blood to be drawn, then they checked me again around 12:30 am, and I was so hopeful for some progress.  However, I was disappointed again for I was still only 1 cm dilated.  When the hospital called Dr. Crooke, he offered for me to take an Ambien to help me sleep and to see how things progressed from there.  If I would have made any sort of progress by this 12:30 time, I was not planning on taking a sleeping pill because I would expect my labor to continue progressing.  However, since I seemed to be stuck in the same place, I decided the best thing to do would be to get some sleep as I was emotionally and physically exhausted.  I don't think either Ben or me got too much sleep as we were interrupted frequently and Ben was sleeping on a pretty uncomfortable pull out couch, but it was better than nothing, that's for sure.

The next morning the nurses checked me again and I was still 1 cm.  Dr. Crooke said I had a choice, I could go home and wait for my labor to progress further, resulting in further dilation, or I could stay at the hospital and get an IV of Pitocin to get things going.  I thought maybe breaking my water could be an option, but apparently Aedan was at too high of a station for that because the umbilical cord could come down first, resulting in an emergency c-section.  Kate came back to the hospital that morning, right about when they were starting me on Pitocin at 9:45.  We decided to go ahead and use Pitocin because we didn't want to go home.  Especially since Ben's parents were already in town watching Samantha, we were already at the hospital, and we were ready to meet our son.  Who knows what would have happened if I decided to go home instead of stay at the hospital.  I could have gone into stronger labor and had to come right back, or I could have had to wait a whole week, getting to 42 weeks and still not truly starting labor on my own, and having to be induced anyways.  It's just a whole lot of who knows.  I didn't want to use any interventions like Pitocin because I didn't want to be put on a track towards getting an epidural, but we had a great nurse, Andrea, who talked to me and reassured me not to be afraid of Pitocin, telling me a story about how she used it with her last baby, and informing me that they will start me out on a low dosage and can always turn it down or off as my body progresses further into active labor.

The next couple hours were spent walking and talking with Kate and Ben, sitting in the rocking chair in my hospital room, and noticing the Pitocin working in making my contractions longer, stronger, and closer together.  Dr. Crooke arrived to check me around 12:30, and even though I was beginning to get contractions that I couldn't talk through, I was still only at 1 cm.  He suggested that we break my water, which again was something I had originally wanted to avoid.  But in the moment, I was so frustrated with my body not making any progress, it's like it just needed a kick start, and I know breaking my water helped things progress a lot faster in my labor with Samantha.  Kate asked me, "Are you sure this is something you are comfortable with?"  And even though I really would have preferred not to have any interventions, in the situation I was in, I felt like I didn't have much of a choice not to.  So, my doctor broke my water, and I instantly dilated to 2 cm.  For some reason, all of these events made me just break down into tears.  I was so emotional, I wanted Aedan to be born so badly, but I was afraid that getting Pitocin and having my water broken would make it impossible for me to have the birth I envisioned for myself.

I sat in the hospital bed for quite some time after that, waiting until I felt comfortable getting up, and until I calmed down from feeling so overwhelmed with emotion.  Kate left the room to get some lunch, and Ben and I started some labor and breathing techniques.  We had Josh Garrels playing on Ben's iPhone in the background, and I leaned over the bedside table while Ben rubbed my arms and back.  We did the slow dancing technique which was really great to help me relax through my contractions.  Once Kate returned she used some counter pressure on my back, which felt amazing, as I leaned over the bedside table and swayed back and forth.  In the little goody bag from the hospital, there was a little hedgehog beanie baby animal, and I used him to lean on and squeeze when I needed to.  I was unable to talk during contractions, and in between contractions I couldn't stop the tears from pouring down my face, soaking into the little hedgehog.  I'm sure that this was all the active labor phase.

Around 3:30 I had to get back in the hospital bed so that they could check me again, which was definitely not comfortable.  I knew that laying back in bed was not a useful position for laboring.  However, I was elated when I was at 7 cm.  I couldn't believe it that I had progressed that far, that I had made it that far, and that I was on my way to giving birth without an epidural or any kind of pain killer medication.  I was also in a lot of pain and knew that it would only get worse from here on out as I entered the transitional stage of labor.  We used several different laboring techniques.  I sat on a round exercise ball while Ben put a cool washcloth on my head and fed me ice chips.  However, when you are in labor it's best not to stay in one position for too long, so they encouraged me to get down on the floor on my hands and knees.  As soon as I got in this position, I remarked, "I don't like this at all."  I don't know whether it was our nurse, Andrea, or Kate, but someone remarked, "Good, it's probably good that you don't like that position because it means your body is getting your baby into a better position for birth."  

After doing that position for several contractions, (sorry if this is too much information), but I really needed to use the restroom, and we were going to try using some hydrotherapy in the shower, so we transitioned to the bathroom.  However, I had hardly a break from one contraction to the next, and they were so, SO intense.  I ended up not ever making it to the shower because I was feeling a strong urge to push.  While I was going to the bathroom, I even had the thought that I didn't really want Aedan to be born into the toilet.  Kate told the nurse what I was experiencing, and they had me lie down on my side in the hospital bed.  This was also not a comfortable position for me.  However, I grabbed on to the side rail of the bed, with Ben at my side, and tried my best to breathe and make low moaning noises through my contractions.  

My wonderful nurse, Andrea, checked me at 4:30 and I was at 10 cm!  I couldn't believe it, and I was SO ready to push Aedan out.  However, Dr. Crooke was not there yet, so they called him and told him to get to the hospital as soon as possible.  Meanwhile, a couple other nurses came in the room to prepare for Aedan's delivery, just in case my doctor couldn't get there in time.  It's so interesting to compare this labor to that of Samantha, since I did not use any pain medication this time.  What other women say is so true, your body just knows what to do.  You have this uncontrollable urge to push, and you can't do anything to stop it.  Andrea was so wonderful and did a great job of bringing me back to reality when I got lost in my own world.  In fact one time when I was making a good bit of noise screaming, Andrea looked at me and said, "Jenny, look at me, you can do this, but you have to breathe.  It's not going to help if you don't breathe."  When you see videos of births, there are many different ways that women react to childbirth, most of the time in a very vocal way, and I really didn't know how I would react.  I definitely screamed and moaned.  I didn't say anything vulgar, but I know I said a couple funny things like, "Can you just pull him out of me?" or "I just want him out, please, please, please." or "Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow."  I'm sure there were other things I said as well, but that's all I can remember right now.

Well, I was definitely ready to push and may have already kind of started, but they kept me on my side until Dr. Crooke arrived at 4:37.  He barely had time to get in the room, get his booties on, and get everything ready.  They had me get onto my back so I could curl up into the C-position for pushing.  Ben was supporting my left leg, and Kate was supporting my right leg, and with four pushes or so, Aedan was born at 4:42 pm.  During those fast five minutes, I heard so many encouraging words about how I was doing.  I heard Ben say he could see his head and all his hair.  I heard Andrea encourage me to push just like that again, that Aedan was making progress, even though I felt like I had no more energy left to give.  And when Aedan was finally born, I exclaimed, "I actually did it!  Oh, I feel so much better now!"  Ben cut the umbilical cord, they wrapped Aedan up in a little blanket, and he was instantly placed on my stomach.  I was so overjoyed and elated to finally be holding my little boy.  Birth is such a miracle, and I couldn't believe that I actually accomplished it without any painkiller or epidural.  It was such an indescribable feeling.

Our hospital has changed a few things about how they do things after a birth.  With Samantha, I got to hold her for a few minutes, but then they took her away to clean her up, weigh her, and do all those things they have to do to newborns.  Well, now they are more of a baby friendly hospital, so they have something called "The Golden Hour" where they basically give you and your baby bonding time for a full hour after birth.  They encourage you to hold your baby skin to skin to help regulate their temperature and also to promote breastfeeding.  After Dr. Crooke finished stitching me up a little bit and everything was stabilized, the nurses all left the room, and we had time together as a family.  Kate stayed for a little while to make sure Aedan latched okay for his first feeding, and then she left to give us our time together.  Our first experience breastfeeding was so wonderful because Aedan did exactly what babies are created to do.  As I held him skin to skin, he started rooting around, seeking out his food source, wiggling himself down towards my breast.  It's so amazing to me that babies automatically have this instinct.

After about an hour, the nurse took Aedan to have him weighed, cleaned off, and checked.  He wasn't too happy about being poked and prodded, but he did enjoy laying on the warmer.  He weighed in at 8 pounds, 13.6 ounces, which when entered into the computer rounded up to 8 pounds, 14 ounces; the same exact weight as Samantha when she was born.  He measured 21 inches long, 1/2 an inch longer than Samantha, and his head circumference was 33.5 cm.  His Apgar score at 1 minute was an 8 and at 5 minutes was a 9.

As he laid in the warmer, he instantly found his thumb on his right hand.  We guessed that he must have done this a lot in his womb because he knew exactly how to soothe himself.  We'll see if the thumb sucking continues.

I think a newborn baby's cry is so precious, and each one is so unique and distinct, that I asked Ben to take a little video while Aedan was lying on the warmer being checked out.  It's fun to look back at Samantha's video and hear what she sounded like as a newborn, so I figured the same would be true for Aedan.

After the nurse was finished with everything she needed to do with Aedan, we were able to just hang out in our hospital room together.  They weren't planning on switching me over to the Mother/Baby unit until the next shift came in at 7:00 pm, so we called Grandpa, Grandma, and Samantha, telling them to come on over to the hospital.  Here is Ben holding his son for the first time.

I have to explain one thing about the significance of the shirt that Ben is wearing.  We call it his engagement shirt because he wore it when he proposed to me back in 2005.  He also wore this shirt on the day of Samantha's birth, so he thought it only appropriate to wear it the on the day of Aedan's birth as well.  This shirt has seen many momentous occasions and has lasted for a very long time.

Grandpa and Grandma arrived at the hospital with Samantha around 7:30 that evening, and we were so excited to see how she would react.  Ben was holding Aedan, and Samantha went right up to Aedan, touching him gently, and saying, "Hi Aedan!" over and over again.  She was so proud to put on her pink "Big Sister" shirt.

Samantha got her chance to hold Aedan and was so cute and gentle with him.  She just kept looking at him, looking at us, and then smiling.  One time she even said, "Hi Aedan.  I'm your big sister.  You're a part of my family now."  It was so cute, so precious; it just melted my heart.  Samantha is going to be such a wonderful big sister, and I was so glad she was able to meet him just a few hours after he was born.

After Samantha had her fill of holding and looking at Aedan, it was Grandma and Granpa's turn.  Aedan's middle name is Arthur, named after Ben's Grandpa, his mom's dad, who passed away a few years ago.  April 29, the day Aedan was born, is also significant to Grandma because it is her birthday as well!

We then decided it was a good time for Samantha and Aedan to exchange their presents for one another.  Samantha picked out a little "shaker" toy, as she called it.  It looks like a little butterfly with colorful wings and a red light that flashes when you shake it.  She was so proud to pick this out for him and loved that we hung it on his car seat right away.  Aedan got Samantha a special Doc McStuffins present.  It had a little Doc McStuffins doll with a stethoscope that talks and sings like her when you push it.  It also came with a doctor's table, Stuffy, and Lambie, who also talk and sing when you place them on the table and push the button.  She was pretty excited when she saw her present, wanting to open it right away.  We told her she had to wait until she got home, and it was up to Grandpa and Grandma whether she opened it that night or had to wait until the next morning.

A little before 8:30, they transferred us to the Mother/Baby Unit, and our family accompanied us there.  Samantha thought it was pretty fun to help push me in the wheel chair while I held Aedan.  I was glad to get in the comfortable hospital bed and snuggle my little baby.  Samantha also decided to get snuggled into bed.  In fact, she was asking about where we would all sleep, so I explained to her that I would sleep in the hospital bed, Daddy would sleep in the twin bed, and Aedan would sleep in the bassinet.  To which she responded, "Where is my bed?  Where will I sleep?"  I'm sure it just looked like a hotel room to her, and she didn't quite understand that she was just there to visit us, that we would have to stay for a couple nights, and that she would be going back home with Grandpa and Grandma.

Samantha then wanted to hold Aedan again, so Daddy helped get her situated on the bed so she could hold her little brother.  She is so sweet and loving with him.  It was wonderful for our family to be together, our little family of four.

Samantha, of course, did not want to leave, but it was past her bedtime, and she needed to get home to sleep.  She cried and had a hard time leaving with Grandpa and Grandma.  It was hard for my heart to see her so upset, the first of many moments where my heart is torn between my two children.  I missed my little girl and couldn't wait until our stay in the hospital was over so we could get back home and back together again as a family.  I know Samantha's world was turned upside down, too, and we are trying to be extra sensitive to her needs through this transitional time.

After Grandpa, Grandma, and Samantha left, Ben and I had some great bonding time with each other and with Aedan.  In fact, I remember Ben sitting on his bed holding Aedan, staring at his face lovingly, and then looking up at me and saying, "I feel like our family is complete."  I have such a sweet, nurturing husband and have so enjoyed this one on one time together without work or household tasks to get in the way.  It's not very often that we don't have things pulling us in opposite directions, so being in the hospital was actually a very relaxing time for us as a couple.

Our first night together was really good.  Ben and I were pretty tired, as was Aedan, so we all just got ready for bed pretty quickly that night.  The policy at the hospital is to wait at least four hours before giving babies their first bath.  However, Aedan had fallen asleep and was so content, we didn't want to upset him by waking him up just to give him a bath.  Learning from our time with Samantha as a newborn, we came to the hospital prepared with the velcro swaddle wraps.  Samantha always slept so much better when wrapped up like a burrito baby, and the same thing seemed true for Aedan.  It's much easier using those swaddle wraps than trying to get a blanket to stay snug and tucked in around a wiggly newborn.  We were pleasantly surprised because he slept pretty well.  He even gave us a three hour stretch of sleep, which we thought was pretty amazing for his first night out of the womb.  Also, he was able to sleep just fine in the bassinet throughout the night.  This was a big struggle with Samantha when we were in the hospital because she would be totally asleep but as soon as we laid her down in the bassinet, she would instantly wake up, causing us to have some pretty sleepless nights in the hospital.  Aedan, however, didn't seem to mind.  He would fall asleep nursing, I was able to lay him down in the bassinet, and everyone would be able to go to sleep.

Our nurse that first night, Amanda, was just wonderful.  She understood the fine balance between getting her work done and checking on us and getting our vitals, along with respecting our sleep and not disturbing us.  There were a couple times that she checked in our room, noticed we were all asleep, and quietly slipped out so as not to disturb us, realizing that sleep was more important than checking my blood pressure or listening to Aedan's heartbeat.  She could just come back later when Aedan woke up.  We GREATLY appreciated this because with Samantha we were constantly interrupted at night.  It seemed like our night nurses were particularly loud and inconsiderate, making the task of figuring out how to take care of a newborn that much more difficult.

We ended up all being awake around 3:15 am, and we decided that was as good a time as any to give Aedan his first bath.  So, I think 3:30 am was his first official bath time.  He wasn't too big of a fan of it, but what baby is?  We had a good rest of the night, waking up the next morning when they brought my breakfast tray in for me.

Grandma took Samantha to the last BSF while Grandpa came to get some snuggle time with Aedan for awhile that morning.  The on call pediatrician, Dr. Howard, came by to check on how Aedan was doing and also performed his circumcision.  Ben went with the doctor to be with Aedan during his circumcision, and apparently it was pretty traumatic for him to watch that.  Afterwards he remarked, "If we have another boy, I don't think I need to go into the room to watch the circumcision."  They used a plastibell ring that will fall off in a week or so.  Apparently, one sign they look for after a circumcision is that they pee within 24 hours, which was no problem for Aedan.  It was almost like he was getting back at the nurses and doctor that circumcised him because he peed a large stream, getting it all over the people and the wall.  Atta' boy!

Being in the hospital really was pretty relaxing for us.  We had a lot of time together to rest and enjoy our new little baby boy.  In fact, I really appreciated something our nurse, Amanda, had written on the white board in our room.  It said, "Goal," and she wrote, "Enjoy baby."  I really took that to heart during those first couple of days in the hospital and even throughout his first week home.  I want to enjoy my baby.  I don't want to be looking ahead, wishing for things to be different.  So often I feel discontent and am itching for the next exciting step or milestone, but then I miss the wonderful moments that are happening right now.  So, my goal is to enjoy Aedan, enjoy all his cuddles, enjoy his funny faces, enjoy talking to him, enjoy nursing him and looking into his eyes, and just enjoy these days when he is so tiny and so dependent upon me because he will get big faster than I would like, and I will miss these beginning days of his life.  I'm going to focus on soaking up every minute of it.

These little pictures were taken right around the time Aedan would have been one day old.  It was hard to believe that he had already been in our arms for that long, but it's such a short time overall.  He is such a part of our family already, I can't imagine life without him.

Later that evening, Grandpa, Grandma, and Samantha came back to the hospital to visit us.  Samantha couldn't wait to see us again, and she was excited to be able to eat dinner with us and watch a show in our hospital room.  As you can tell, she is wearing her pink "Big Sister" shirt again.  She was so proud to call herself a big sister, and of course, all other parts of her outfit had to be pink to match.

Back before Aedan was born, Samantha colored a picture for him, and we printed out a little picture of her so that we could put it in his bassinet.  That way he could see what his big sister looked like, and it would make her feel special that her picture is right next to where he slept.  Now, we didn't really leave it in there when he was in there because it kept flopping over, but we always made sure to put it in before Samantha came over to visit us.

After Samantha's visit on Wednesday night, Daddy decided to go back home with her, give her a bath, and put her to bed, in an attempt to give her life some sort of normalcy and let her know that we are still here for her and care for her.  While Daddy was gone, Aedan began his first night of cluster feeding.  Pretty much from 5:30 on, for the next several hours, Aedan just wanted to continuously nurse.  If he was not nursing, then he was very upset and inconsolable.  My friend Andrea and her husband, Dimitar, came by to visit around 6:45 and left around 8:00, and unfortunately, since Aedan just wanted to eat, they were unable to hold him at all.  They didn't mind though, they just enjoyed seeing him and talking to me about my labor experience, as they are expecting their first child in September.  Here is a picture of my little boy once he finally got his belly full and fell asleep contentedly on my lap.

Ben arrived shortly after 8:00 after successfully putting Samantha to bed.  She didn't even make a peep after he left her room, but that probably had a lot to do with the fact that she didn't really nap at all the whole time Grandpa and Grandma were with her.  (They are just too exciting to be around to allow for a nap!)  Aedan finally decided his tummy was full, but really I didn't mind because cluster feeding in the evening is much better than cluster feeding in the middle of the night.  Even though it was only about 8:30, Ben and I were exhausted from a long day, and you never know what the night will hold when you have a newborn, so we decided to get to bed.  I think we were all in bed by 9:15.  It felt so good to get some rest, and Aedan again did a really good job sleeping, giving us 2-3 hour chunks of sleep at a time, and sleeping really well in his bassinet.

The next morning I slept in, not even noticing that they brought the breakfast tray into our room for me.  We had the picture lady coming to take Aedan's newborn pictures at 10:00, so we all got up, get ready, and got dressed.  Here are some pictures of Aedan and Daddy while we hung out together that morning.

Aedan did really well for his pictures, and they turned out great.  It was the same picture lady from when we had Samantha, so we even got one pose that is the exact same with our hands holding Aedan.  We figured it would be nice to have a similar picture of both our children.

The rest of the day we just hung out, waiting until 4:42 pm when they could do the newborn bloodwork, and we could be discharged from the hospital.  Dr. Crooke came back to check on me briefly at lunch time, saying that everything looked good and I didn't need to take any extra iron.  He even said, "Good work, JT.  We're proud of you!"  Dr. Howard came back to check on Aedan.  His circumcision was looking good, he passed his hearing screening and his heart screening, so he got the go ahead to be discharged as soon as they got his newborn bloodwork done and were able to check his bilirubin number for any indication of jaundice.  Our time in the hospital was so relaxing, such a nice bonding time between the three of us.  It was nice to have this time together, to get to know each other better, with Samantha well taken care of at home.  I thoroughly enjoyed my afternoon of snuggling and napping with my little man.

Our nurse, Leigh, on this last day of our hospital stay, was also extremely helpful.  She knew we didn't want to stay very long after the newborn bloodwork was done.  We wanted to leave as soon as possible so that we could have an evening at home with our family and our little girl.  So, she was really on top of things, got everything taken care of for us with our discharge paperwork, and was very efficient in getting us out of there as soon as possible.  We had such a pleasant experience at the hospital this time and were so thankful for the wonderful nurses we had both in Labor and Delivery and in the Mother/Baby Unit.

All of Aedan's bloodwork came back fine, although it did take them quite a while to get enough blood from the heel of his foot to fill the little vial and the five little circles on the paper.  They had to prick his foot a couple different times in order to draw enough blood.  Samantha had the same problem, so apparently it runs in the family, we have good blood clotters.  Aedan's discharge weight was 8 pounds, 4 ounces, and his bilirubin number was 8.3, which was great.  Grandpa brought Samantha back to the hospital so that she could ride home with us.  She thought it was pretty cool that she could help wheel me out in the wheelchair and that she could ride in the backseat next to her new baby brother.  Here we are arriving at home with Aedan for the first time.

As we brought Aedan in the house and back into the living room, Samantha got so wrapped up into everything that was happening that she ended up having an accident.  All of a sudden, she was standing there looked down, and I could see her little jeans getting all wet.  She immediately started crying hysterically, and I carried her off to the bathroom, reassuring her that it was okay, that it was just an accident.  It took awhile for her to get calmed down, and then we were able to get her dressed and ready for dinner.

We put Aedan in the swing while we ate dinner, and he really seemed to like it.  It put him right to sleep.

Then, after a good nap, he had quite a bit of awake time.  He was just looking around, almost like he was taking in all of his surroundings, his new home.

After dinner that night, we also had a mini-celebration of Daddy's birthday.  It wasn't a very momentous occasion, but I guess getting to bring home your first son on your 30th birthday is a pretty special way to celebrate.  We had ice cream cake, sang Happy Birthday, and I gave him his present, new cologne.

Our first night home was a little different from the previous two nights in the hospital.  We were glad to be back in our own bed in our own house, but Aedan didn't have as good of a night.  He was nursing fine and didn't seem to be cluster feeding or anything, he was just not content being in his bassinet, even though he slept just fine in the one at the hospital.  After several failed attempts to have him sleep, I ended up just sitting on the glider in our room, covering myself up with a blanket, and holding him while he slept.  I was able to sleep for most of the time, too, but I kept waking up every time he would twitch or breathe deeply.  Around 3:30 in the morning, I decided to try laying him down again, but to no avail.  So in an attempt to get some better sleep myself, I just brought him into bed with me.  He snuggled himself right up next to my body, and that is how we slept for the rest of the night.  Even though I would have rather had a "good" night's sleep, I can't complain about having the opportunity to snuggle with my little boy.

I woke up pretty tired on Friday morning after a long night, but we were so grateful to have Grandpa and Grandma with us still.  They volunteered to get up with Samantha so that we could sleep in and get some extra rest.  We had a pretty laid back day, hanging out, getting used to being at home with Aedan, and trying to rest as much as possible.  Grandpa and Grandma took good care of Samantha for us so that all we really had to worry about was caring for Aedan.  After getting Samantha down for a nap that afternoon, Grandma told me to go upstairs and take a nap, and she was taking care of doing laundry for me.  However, as soon as I laid down to get some rest, Aedan woke up from his nap in the swing and wanted to nurse, so I didn't get too much of a chance to rest, but you can't expect too much with a newborn.

Later that evening, after dinner, we decided to get some cute pictures of Samantha and Aedan, together as brother and sister, on their first day at home together.  Samantha has on her "Big Sister" shirt, and Aedan has on his "Little Brother" onesie.  They are so adorable together.  She is such a good, loving big sister already.  It will be wonderful to see how their relationship grows as they grow up together.

After giving Samantha a bath on Friday night, we decided to give Aedan a bath and we let Samantha "help" us.  Aedan wasn't too big of a fan of being in the water and cried quite a bit.  Also, as soon as the water hit him, he started to pee, which greatly surprised Samantha, making her so upset that she cried and had to be taken away from where we were giving Aedan a bath until she calmed down.  I think she just didn't expect it, and it surprised her.  We got through the bath quickly and got Aedan dressed again, which made him much happier.  First baths at home are always such an experience. :)

After Aedan was all dressed in his pajamas, our sweet little Samantha wanted to hold him, so Daddy helped her.  Here are our sweet children, all clean, in their pajamas, and ready for bed.  So precious.  It just melts my heart.  These pictures will be cherished for years to come.

After a rather rough night on Thursday night, Friday night went much better.  Aedan would give us 2-3 hour chunks of sleep at a time, which really, as a parent of a newborn, that is just wonderfully refreshing.  He did fine sleeping in his bassinet as well, which I was grateful for.  My goal for the night really wasn't about how long he would sleep, but just about him being able to sleep in the bassinet after he was done nursing, so we achieved our goal. :)

Grandpa and Grandma were planning on leaving Saturday evening after dinner.  So again, they got up with Samantha, allowing Ben and me to sleep in, which was so nice of them.  They offered to clean the house for me before they left, and they also took Samantha out to Menard's so they could get sand to make Samantha a sandbox outside by our patio.  Aedan had his two day check up that afternoon, so we were grateful that they took Samantha out so that way she wasn't upset about not being able to come with us.  He did a great job at the doctor, not crying too much when they checked him out or weighed him.  His height was still 21 inches, his weight was 8 pounds, 10 ounces, and his head circumference was 35 cm.  They checked his bilirubin level for jaundice and that came out to 10.6, which was really good.  Dr. Esarey asked if we had any questions, and we really didn't have any.  It's amazing how much more laid back we are the second time around.  Breastfeeding is going well.  He is peeing and pooping like a champ.  He is a happy, easygoing baby, so we really had no concerns to raise.  I guess easy doctor's appointments are a good thing. :)  Going to the doctor really wore him out.  Here he is asleep in his car seat after the appointment that afternoon.

The rest of Saturday went well.  Samantha did not take a nap because she was too excited about Grandpa and Grandma being there still.  When she came down from her room, she could not wait to get outside and play in her sandbox with Grandma.  She got her bucket and shovel, some toy cars, and some cups to play with.  They were outside playing for quite some time, so I just had to capture these precious moments of a grandmother and her granddaughter playing together.

Grandpa and Grandma offered to buy us dinner from somewhere, and actually offered up Sweet Grass as an option.  I can never turn down that restaurant, so we feasted on a delicious dinner that night.  After dinner it was time for Grandpa and Grandma to go home, but Samantha did not want them to leave.  In fact, she sat on their laps practically begging them to stay.  It didn't help that she was overtired from not napping and staying up too late at night, but she was really sad to see them leave after them staying at our house for almost an entire week.  She really enjoyed her one on one time with them.  They did an amazing job making her feel special and loved, and we are so appreciative of all they did to help us while we were at the hospital and when we first got home.  We certainly couldn't have done it without them.  Thank you Grandpa and Grandma!

I had to admit, I was sad to see them go, too.  It was nice having someone to occupy Samantha and give her attention when we couldn't.  It was nice having someone to help us cook and clean, and it was nice to have some other company around the house for awhile.  I looked to Ben and said, "Well, we're on our own now."

Saturday night was another rough night with Aedan.  He didn't seem to be happy laying down on his back.  We thought he might be having tummy troubles and some gas, so Ben decided to sit in the rocking chair with him for awhile and eventually brought him downstairs so that he could sleep on his tummy comfortably.  I was grateful for Ben taking his turn with Aedan that night, even though he had a big day with teaching his ACG on Sunday morning.  Once again, what a sweet, thoughtful husband I have, looking out for my best interest.

I stayed home from church on Sunday, but Ben and Samantha went to church together.  I helped Samantha get ready for church, and she requested that I braid her hair.  (I think she likes it this way because then she looks like Anna from the movie Frozen.)  Ben and I were in the other room upstairs getting dressed, and then went looking for where Samantha was, and we found her in Aedan's room, sitting right next to him in his little chair, looking quietly at a book.  It was SO sweet.  Samantha loves her "little Aedan," can't wait to see him in the morning, and loves to be near him, wherever he is in the house.

It was kind of strange being home by myself with Aedan, but it was so nice and quiet.  He fell asleep in this little chair, and I found myself just sitting in front of him, watching him sleep.  I think I had a pretty peaceful morning companion.  It was lovely.

Sunday afternoon, after eating lunch together, Samantha ended up actually falling asleep for a nap, which we were so grateful for since she hadn't taken one most of the week when Grandpa and Grandma were visiting us.  Aedan also fell asleep and took a good nap in the swing, so Ben and I decided to put the monitor downstairs so we could hear when Aedan woke up, and went upstairs to take a nap ourselves.  We figured we'd take advantage of both of our children napping at the same time, as I'm sure that won't be an every day occurrence.

For some reason, I was in a lot of pain on Sunday from the stitches I had to get.  It seemed like even though I took ibuprofen and was taking it easy, it hurt to even sit.  I am definitely ready to be feeling back to normal physically, and even though it hasn't even been a week yet, I am feeling ready to be able to move and act like myself again.

Sunday night Michelle and Sadie came over to bring us dinner, visit with me, and see Aedan for the first time.  It was great to sit and talk to her for awhile, to share the story of my labor, to catch up a little bit, and to see how much Sadie has grown and changed since I stopped watching her at the beginning of April.  It was also very generous of her to bring us dinner, and we are so thankful for all the people who have signed up to bring us meals over the next few weeks.

Monday was my first day at home with just Samantha and Aedan.  Daddy stayed home a little later in the morning before heading to campus, but the day went really well, even with having both kids.  Once Aedan fell asleep for awhile in the morning, Samantha and I had some good bonding time playing together, and I painted her fingernails and toenails, something she wanted me to do for quite some time.  I also was able to get Aedan into the Moby Wrap so that we could go outside and play on the jungle gym and swings in our apartment complex.  It was a pretty successful morning, and overall, I felt like it wasn't too bad having both Samantha and Aedan to take care of by myself.  Many people will ask me how things are going with Aedan and Samantha, and most of the time my answer is that it is easier than I thought it would be.  I don't know if I just had really low expectations for how much work two kids would be, and granted, it's only been a week so things can change, Aedan could get fussier and Samantha could get more jealous and act out, but so far, adding Aedan to our family just seems natural.  He fits right in.  We love him him so much.  He's only been in our family for a week, but I already cannot imagine our life without him.  He is such a wonderful blessing to our family, and I can't wait to see how our family will grow and change with this new little boy entrusted to our care.