Grandpa's Funeral, the End of Ema's and Papa's Visit, and Tired Kids

Samantha: 99 Months, Week 4
Aedan: 65 Months, Week 2
Owen: 23 Months, Week 4

Sunday, September 8th was kind of a strange day because I had to head out to the airport to fly out to Chicago so I could be around for my grandpa's funeral on Monday afternoon. The kids left for church with Ema and Papa, and I finished getting a few things ready and then left myself. I was flying out of Syracuse, New York, which is about 2 1/2 hours away, but Ben found me a flight for $53, so we couldn't pass up that deal, even if it meant I had to drive a little farther. It was a pretty small airport, so I got through security around 12:30 and then found food to eat for lunch. My flight ended up being delayed about half an hour, and while I was waiting, I stumbled across some pictures of us at my grandpa's house when we went to Florida the summer before Owen was born, and I sent some of them to my dad in a little email. I didn't know grandpa all that well, since we only got to see him when we would make the trip down to Florida, but I was starting to feel a little bit emotional about it. However, as I told my dad in the email, I was so glad that my kids, Ben, and I got to see him several times over the last 7 years. I have these memories to hold of him: from staying at his house when Samantha was 18 months old, to him meeting us at Epcot when Samantha was 3 and Aedan was a baby and him holding Samantha's hand as they walked around together, to the time in these pictures when we visited him at his house for awhile and went out to Wendy's together, to our trip down in February when we got to spend time with him in the hospital and he got to see all our family together at one time, to when I went down by myself in July and got to take him out to dinner. I am glad I was able to make the time to see him, even if some of them were shorter visits, and I will always remember this time we spent together.

I don't get to travel by myself much, but I really have come to enjoy it. I can eat what I want, I can sit and read, and I get a lot of introverted time because even though you are in a crowd of people at the airport or on the airplane, you don't have to talk to anyone if you don't want to. I checked out "The Hobbit" from the library, since I have never read it before, and I read for pretty much the whole flight. I really enjoy reading, and I am sad that I don't have much time to do it anymore.

My parents picked me up at the airport and drove me out to Christy's house. It was good to have that time to talk to each other in the car on the way there. Once there, we just hung out in her house, and she made dinner for us all in the crock pot. I was still recovering from my really bad cold, so I tried to keep my distance from her kids so I wouldn't pass my germs on to them, but Oliver and I built a tall wall out of magna-tiles, and I helped her get the kids to bed, reading books to Brielle, while she took care of Oliver, since she always has to do bedtime on her own. Throughout the evening and after the kids were in bed, I was able to talk to my dad, and it was good to talk about Grandpa and reminisce about him some. My dad had some interesting papers from Grandpa's time in the war that he showed us, along with birth, death, and marriage certificates of various people in the family. It was really interesting to learn a little bit more about my dad's side of the family. Then, once my mom and dad left for the night, Christy and I talked to late into the night, much later than we should have stayed up, but it was good to catch up with each other and not have to talk between interruptions from kids.

Ben took Ema and Papa to church with the kids on Sunday. After church, Ben took the kids over to a birthday party for our neighbor who just turned 1. The kids had fun, but they were all kind of ready to get back to Ema and Papa. Samantha had the hardest time of the three kids, probably just because of the difference of me being gone. 

However, the big thing of Sunday was getting the garage door opener changed. Papa did a lot of work to get it done, while Ben dealt with kids. He tried to help as much as he could, but each time he went down there another kid would need him. Owen was the most interested in what Papa was doing. Even now, more than a month later, Owen will point to the opener and say, "Garage, working, hammer, Papa." He found it really fascinating to help Papa, and he would bring tools over as much as he could help. That night Owen woke up several times throughout the night, but Ben said he was pretty easy to get back to sleep. 

Monday morning Christy and I got up and got ready to drive up to Wisconsin for Grandpa's funeral. It was 3 1/2 hours away, so we had quite a bit of a drive to do, plus we wanted to leave time to stop for lunch on the way there. It was nice to be able to drive in the car by ourselves and have more time to talk, as well as reminisce about Grandpa. We stopped at Chik-fil-a for lunch, and it was a very dreary, rainy day for most of our trip up to Friendship, Wisconsin.

As we approached our destination, I found myself praying a lot, that I could be a good support for my family, and that I could find the words to say to help comfort my dad in his mourning. I knew this was going to be a hard and emotional day for everyone. When we first went in the funeral home, it was just my parents and brother, so we were able to have time with my dad and to go in and see Grandpa in our own time. As soon as I saw him in his casket in the front of the room, I started crying. I wanted to stay strong for my dad, but I couldn't help the emotions that were coming from me. We had a little bit of time before the service started so we talked for a little while and made sure all the arrangements were set up. Here is a poster my dad made of pictures of Grandpa.

And here's the obituary the funeral home posted on their website for my grandpa:

Richard H. Kappel

Richard H. Kappel

Richard H. Kappel age 99, passed away August 31, 2019, at his home in Leesburg, Florida.

Funeral services will be 3:00 p.m. on Monday, September 9th, 2019 at Roseberry’s Funeral Home in Friendship. Interment with military honors will be at the Mt. Repose Cemetery in Friendship. Visitation will be 2:00 p.m. until the time of service at the funeral home.

Richard was born November 3, 1919, to Johann and Elisabeth (Karner) Kappel. He graduated from Adams-Friendship High School in 1937. Richard enlisted in the United States Air Force on October 2, 1941. He earned his wings from the Air Force Advanced Flying School at Kirtland Field Albuquerque, New Mexico in March of 1943. He was commissioned a Second Lieutenant after three months of rigorous flight training and took his place in the air force as a Bombardier. Richard served in Germany during WWII where in March of 1944, he was taken as a prisoner of war and was reported MIA when he and his crew members had failed to return after a bombing raid. He was returned to U.S. military control in May of 1945 and was honorably discharged in December of that year.

Richard was united in marriage to his first wife Alma prior to entry in WWII and later united in marriage to his second wife Nellie in 1957.

After military service, he worked for the railroad for a short time and subsequently worked for Standard Oil for over 30 years driving a fuel truck until his retirement.

Over the years Richard had memberships with VFW and The American Legion.

Richard enjoyed reading and collecting coins. He also enjoyed playing darts and pool.

Richard was preceded in death by his father, mother, brother Adolph, brother Walter, first wife Alma and second wife Nellie.

He is survived by his son, Richard J. Kappel, Lombard, IL; grandson Matthew, Lombard, IL, granddaughters: Jennifer, Wilkes Barre, PA and Christine, Aurora, IL; great-grandsons: Aedan, Owen, and Oliver; great-granddaughters: Samantha and Brielle; niece, Karen (Charles) Church, Grand Marsh, WI; Barbara Jean (Robert)  Meyers of East Wenatchee, WA; Elisabeth Kappel of Hartford, WI; and Joan (Ronnie) Hunter of Palacios, TX.  Further survived by other relatives and friends.

Here is a link to his funeral service: https://youtu.be/8_uwnw36LB8

The funeral service was nice, and they played the songs "In the Garden" and "Old Rugged Cross", both of which made me cry. I didn't know my grandpa all that well personally. I know he went to church with Peg, his friend across the street, but I don't know if or how much he followed Christ himself, and I think it was that unknown feeling that made me feel uneasy. The funeral really got me thinking about the brevity of life and how there are so many things that make me spin my wheels or get frustrated that are really not important in the long run.

Right from the funeral service, we went out to the cemetery, where they were going to do military honors. In fact, they had two actual marines there that did the ceremony of folding the flag. I had never seen any of this close up, so it was a humbling experience, and a great honor for my dad to see this done for my grandpa, as he was a POW in WWII.

Here is a link to the internment service at the cemetery: https://youtu.be/ydAQvr61BRU. It was too long to upload on the blog, so I uploaded it on YouTube instead.

After the internment was finished, we spent some time looking around the cemetery because most of my dad's family is buried there. I took a picture of some of the tombstones because I thought that Ben would find it interesting. Here are the tombstones of my grandpa's parents, John and Elizabeth Kappel.

Here is the tombstone of my grandpa's oldest brother, Adolph, and his wife, Iva.

And here is the tombstone of my grandpa's mom, who committed suicide when my dad was only 7 years old. He was then sent to live with his mom's mom in Friendship, Wisconsin and spent the rest of his younger years living there until going back to Chicago for high school.

After talking about various relatives at the cemetery with some of my dad's cousins that, to my knowledge, I have never bet before, we all headed out to a family restaurant overlooking what used to be a lake that my dad would swim in with his friends every day during the summer. It was good to sit inside a warm restaurant and visit with my dad's family. They all looked very similar in their facial features and the steel blue eyes, and I got to hear some stories about their life growing up. It was fun to hear so much about my dad's life that I had never heard before. I met two cousins of his that were very friendly, and I really enjoyed talking with these family members that were such a meaningful part of my dad's life growing up. It made me wish that we could have had more interaction with his side of the family. It was cool to see my dad talking with his relatives, and I was glad that I was able to be there to be a part of this whole day in honoring the life of my grandpa.

From what I heard from Ben about how the day went with Ema and Papa getting the kids off to school, Aedan had a hard time leaving for school that morning because he knew that Ema and Papa would be gone when he got back home from school, which made him really sad. He cried and didn't want to get on the van, and then he cried when it was time for him to go into his classroom. It took some convincing from Samantha to get him to go in. Ben ended up sending his teacher an email to explain what was going on and why he was acting so emotional that day. After school, Ben said the kids did well and just had a little bit of homework. Owen was yawning a lot during dinner, and all the kids were tired after a long weekend, Ema and Papa going home, and me not being there and making life feel different. Ben got a little bit of an explanation for Owen's behavior once he realized that he was really hot that evening. His temperature was 102.7, and he just wanted to sit on Ben's lap all night, so you could tell that he wasn't feeling well. Even though he acted okay during the day with Ema and Papa and took a good nap, he was definitely fighting off something that evening. Ben also told me that he woke up three times during the night crying. I felt bad that he was dealing with a sick toddler on his own, and I hoped that Owen wasn't coming down with something.

I rode back down from Wisconsin with my parents and brother, so they could drop me off at the hotel I was staying at near the airport. I would need to leave for the airport at 8:00, so I decided it would make more sense to just stay somewhere close by, especially since I would be getting there so late in the first place. We talked some in the car, but after awhile I could tell everyone was just getting tired. It had been a long, emotional day for everyone, but I was glad to be able to share this time with my family.

I found myself very tired on Tuesday after being up late the night before and everything that went on that day. I got to the airport in plenty of time to get through security, got myself some coffee, and then just sat and relaxed until the plane was boarding. I tried to read on the plane, but I found myself almost too tired to concentrate, so I listened to some music and wrote in my journal for awhile, just taking time to process the events of the past couple days. I think I may have even fallen asleep for awhile. It was a pretty uneventful plane ride, and I didn't have anyone sitting in the seat next to me, which was nice. Once back in Syracuse, I got out to the car and started the 2 1/2 hour drive back home, getting back right around dinnertime. Everyone was excited to see me, and I was glad to be back home. 

Here are some papers from Aedan's first couple of days of school that week. He comes home with a lot of papers, and it's fun to see what he's working on during the day. (You can tell that sometimes he is a lot more into coloring than other times where he just scribbles on each picture.)

The papers below are a copy of his DIBELS score for the Fall. It was interesting to see what they measured him to know so far, and reassuring to see confirmation that he is on track to becoming a strong reader.

Wednesday was back to our normal routine of walking Samantha and Aedan down to the van to get picked up for school, and then spending the day with Owen. We didn't do too much that day, as I kind of needed a day to rest and just get stuff done around the house. We played outside for awhile, and at some point that morning, Owen found these sunglasses and wanted me to take some pictures of him. He loves looking at himself in pictures, so we took quite a few. I love his silliness and his little smile, so I couldn't help but include quite a few of them.

These pictures of Owen smiling are my favorite. He is saying, "Cheese!" and he looks so grown up with his sunglasses on. Plus, the dimples...he is just such a cutie.

Here is more of Aedan's work that he came home with on Wednesday.

At Bahweting they used standards-based report cards, so Samantha never really got grades on anything, and there were very rarely papers or tests sent home, so we never really knew how she was doing, which I was not a big fan of. Lehman-Jackson uses a traditional grading structure, which I like, and I am enjoying getting work sent home so that we know how the kids are doing on their work and are able to check their understanding. The papers below are Samantha's first math quiz in her 4th grade math class. She did an excellent job and was very proud of herself, although we had to explain to her that all the Cs meant correct, and not that she got a C on her quiz.

And here is more of Aedan's work.

On Thursday it was time for Owen and I to do our weekly grocery shopping at Walmart. It was pretty uneventful, and like I've said before, Owen is easy to shop with and has enjoyed being able to help me pick produce when we get to that part of the store. It always takes a little longer letting him help, but he enjoys being more involved. Much to my chagrin, Izzy peed on the floor in the basement again while we were gone, so then I had to clean that up, as well as bring all the groceries in, put everything away, and get Owen and I lunch so he could go down for his nap, so all of that was a bit hectic and stressful. I then decided I would start containing Izzy in the bathroom and our room from now on when I left so that way she couldn't access any rugs to pee on, at least until she stops taking this steroid that seems to be making her have trouble with her bladder.

Ben talked to me later that day about an interesting conversation he had with the director of study abroad. Ben basically could write up a proposal for a study abroad experience and as long as he gets the students and is revenue neutral then he would be good to go. He said he should look into leading a trip to Ireland. He made it sound like it would be super easy. The director also asked Ben to think about applying to be the director. It would be one of those two course per semester reductions with a summer stipend position. Ben said it would be something he would think about because it would be nice to only teach two classes a semester, but he is definitely going to put some research into leading a trip to Ireland. Our family would be able to come over as well, but we would obviously have to pay our own way. But, Ben would be paid for and given money for teaching the class, which would then pay for the trip. It would be so fun to go on a trip to Ireland like that, and to be able to bring the kids and show them where Mommy and Daddy met and fell in love.

Luckily, Owen's fever only lasted a couple of days, and he was doing better with sleeping. He didn't wake up at all Wednesday night, and he went to bed really well on Thursday night, which we were grateful for. Aedan and Samantha were both super tired on Thursday. In fact, they were in bed, and I left their room for the night by 7:30. It's not very common for Ben and I to have all three kids in bed by 7:30, but it felt good to have such an extended evening ahead of us, with the kids in bed and getting a good night's sleep.

There wasn't much significant that happened on Friday. I usually use Fridays as laundry days, especially for sheets and towels. However, as we were getting ready for lunch on Friday, I decided to get our little booster seat out of the garage to hook on to our kitchen chair. Owen has been pretty resistant to sitting in his high chair lately, so I figured he would enjoy feeling like a big boy and sitting at the table to eat. So here is my little boy who will be 2 in four days, sitting at the table and feeling so happy and proud.

Friday was one of those days where I was missing people I knew back in Michigan, missing the MOPS group that I was a part of, so I wore the shirt from last year, took a picture of myself, and posted it on their Facebook page, letting them know I was thinking about them. It's hard being in a new place and not knowing anyone, not having a group of people to connect with, and not being known by anyone. I know that it will take time, and I haven't been able to meet many people yet since MOPS hasn't started up here, and community groups haven't started up yet, but it doesn't change the fact that being a stay-at-home mom in a new city can be lonely sometimes.

The only other thing I had to do that day was go to the doctor for my health appraisal to be filled out for fostering. It was an easy appointment, and then I was on my way back home for dinner with my family.

The boys' suits for Uncle Tim and Aunt Pla's wedding came in this past week, and Aedan had been begging for several days to try his on, so after dinner that night, we got them out of the bag and dressed both boys. They were so excited to put their little gray suits on, and they looked so handsome. (Aunt Jeni ordered Samantha's dress along with Alaina's, so she didn't have her dress to try on.) They are really looking forward to being in the wedding.

I love Aedan's pose and Owen's expression in this picture, plus Samantha smiling and photo-bombing in the the background.

Oh, my two little boys are so handsome and grown-up looking in their matching suits. :)

Saturday was supposed to be a rainy day, and we wanted to do something with the kids, but nothing big, so we decided to go to Barnes and Noble in Wilkes-Barre to let the kids play and look at books for awhile. They have a train table set up and actually had a Pete the Cat story time that we didn't know about until we got there. While the kids were there with Ben, I ran out and picked up a sit and stand stroller from a local mom that was selling it. It was in really good condition and options for a seat with buckles in the back, or just the platform seat for when they get older, and it accommodates infant seats, so it gives us lots of options for the future when we have a foster child. After getting the stroller, I went back to Barnes and Noble to hang out with everyone for a little while, and then we went back home for lunch, nap time for Owen, and quiet play time for Samantha and Aedan. They are still getting adjusted to being back in school, so low key weekends are important to let them have free time to play and do what they want to do.

(Blog about September 8-14, 2019)