Owen's Sleeping Troubles, Aedan's VBS Performance & Samantha's First Musical Theater Performance

Samantha: 85 Months, Week 2
Aedan: 50 Months, Week 5
Owen: 9 Months, Week 2 (Week 41)

Since we got back home on Saturday afternoon, we were able to get everything unpacked and start working on our mountain of laundry. In addition to going to church on Sunday morning, I spent most of the afternoon doing a quick clean of the house. I find myself doing a quick clean every couple of weeks in between my more thorough cleanings that I do once a month (if I'm lucky). With three kids and a dog, and our windows and doors open for the summer, I find that I definitely need to clean more, especially the floors. And with little Owen crawling around on the floor, I want the floors to not get too bad, although he is the third kid, so you know, things are let go much more than when we just had Samantha.

The other new thing we got to do on Sunday night was attend a Married People small group. We missed the first week when we were on our vacation last week, but we figured we could still attend the following five sessions. I was excited to be able to meet with other couples in a group where we could spend time talking about how to have a strong marriage. Having three kids and the busyness of life definitely puts strain on your marriage relationship, and Ben and I know that our family is only as strong as our marriage. The other wonderful thing is that a dear couple from church, Linda and Ken, offered to watch our kids for us so that we could attend the small group without worrying about dragging them along. Other people were bringing kids, and they were just going to play outside with the adults met, which would have been fine for Samantha and Aedan, but we would have kept Owen with us, which really would not have worked. He is just too loud and active now. The kids were super excited about having Linda and Ken come over to babysit. Linda volunteered her time in the baby room at MOPS every week, and she kind of took to Owen, so he was familiar with her, and I felt totally comfortable leaving our kids in their hands. I think they may have been just as excited about it as the kids were. They took on a wonderful grandparent role with the kids, which just touched my heart since we are so far away from the kids' grandparents. Ben and I had a good time getting to know other couples in the small group, we had great conversation, and it was nice being able to get away and do something with just the two of us.

I forget when exactly it happened this week, but with Aedan now in a big boy bed, he had really done a great job transitioning. However, just before leaving for vacation, Ben and I were sitting in the living room and we heard a loud bang. Aedan had fallen out of his room, and I rushed to his room to make sure he was okay and helped him back into his bed. I sat with him for awhile because he was a little shaken up, and then he cuddled back into his pillow, ready to go back to sleep. When I talked to him about it the next morning, he had no recollection of ever falling out of bed or of me coming in his room, which I thought was pretty funny.

The other big deal in Aedan's life was transitioning from wearing a pull-up at night to wearing regular underwear. Awhile back he was staying dry every night, and then all of a sudden he started peeing in his pull-up pretty much every night, which was a little confusing to us. However, probably for the last several weeks, he had stayed dry every night with no problem. He started asking us if he could wear underwear to bed, so after we returned from vacation, we decided to let him try it out. We made sure to remind him to let us know if he needed to go to the bathroom by talking, and that we could hear him on the monitor, and then we could come upstairs and help him go to the bathroom. I was a little nervous about trying it at first, especially with how much we were already waking up with Owen, but he did such a spectacular job. He has not had an accident once in his bed, and most nights he goes all night without having to get up and go to the bathroom. Every once in awhile he will call out saying he has to go, and most of the times are in the early morning hours between 5:30-6:30. I am so proud of him, and sometimes I forget how big he is getting. He is certainly no little boy anymore.

Monday through Friday that week, Samantha and Aedan both had activities every day. We signed Samantha up for a musical theater camp through the Soo Theatre, so she was going to do that from 10-3 every day with a performance on Friday night and Saturday afternoon. They were putting on Willy Wonka Jr., and Samantha was so excited about going to this camp and being in a real play. Since Samantha was going to be gone every day, I decided to sign Aedan up for a local VBS from 9-12 every day. I wanted him to be able to do something special while Samantha was gone, so I asked if he would be interested in going to VBS, and he was very much interested. He wasn't nervous at all when I dropped him off on that first day, he went right in, sat with his group, and waved good-bye to me. Then, a little while later, I dropped Samantha off. There was a little mix-up with the camp that she was signed up for, but we got that straightened out, and she was so ready to get started.

Ben was working on campus, so I went back home to try to get Owen to take a morning nap. However, he fell asleep on my shoulder, like he normally does, but then woke up two minutes after I laid him down. I was so frustrated that he was doing this again. It seemed like he did better when we were out of town, waking once or twice a night, but I was able to just nurse him and he'd go back to sleep. But now as soon as we got back home, he started doing this again, waking up over and over again, sometimes just minutes after laying him down. And he was doing it at nap time and at bed time, it didn't seem to matter the time of day or how tired he was. I felt like there had to be something going on. Lately, it seemed like there was always something, and I just wanted him to finally get into a decent and consistent routine with sleeping. I even tried nursing him to see if he'd fall asleep doing that, but he wasn't interested in nursing himself to sleep. I tried just laying him in his bed for awhile because I felt like I needed a break, and he ended up just crying in his bed for half an hour. I needed to get some stuff done around the house before it was time to pick up Aedan from VBS, and I just needed a break from dealing with him. I felt at a loss to know how to deal with it, but I knew Ben and I couldn't keep doing life like this. We all needed more sleep. In fact, I was actually talking to someone that day about some essential oils we could diffuse in his room to hopefully help him calm down and sleep better. I didn't know what to do anymore, and sometimes I felt like I was losing my mind. I was just so tired and felt like I couldn't even function like a normal person half the time. We give him ibuprofen before bed and everything, to help him in case he's teething, and sometimes it seems like it works and sometimes not. We were up six times during the night on Sunday night, and I knew it would be hard for me to have another night like that. I don't function well with little sleep. 

On Monday night Ben had his softball games and Aedan had tee-ball, and it was a little bit of a crazy night getting everyone ready and out the door. My friend, Denise, offered to watch Owen for me while I took Aedan to tee-ball, so that was a nice break for me after a not so great day with Owen. Aedan did better at tee-ball this week, and he responded really well to me standing out in the field and encouraging him to hit me with the ball when he was practicing hitting off the tee. He hit the ball much farther than he did the previous week. Plus, at the end of practice they played a practice game which was really fun for the kids to take turns hitting the ball, running the bases, and catching balls in the field. Aedan got a little upset when he didn't get any of the balls that were hit into the field, but I tried to explain that he needed to just stay in his area and wait for a ball to come his way, rather than running all the way across the field to a ball.

After a long, tiring day with Owen, it was hard for me to feel like I had any energy that evening while watching Ben's softball game. I thought about just going home, but that would mean I would have to put all three kids to bed myself, so it was actually easier just to stay at the game. Samantha and Aedan had fun playing with other kids on a big pile of dirt off on the side of the field. In fact, they got so dirty that we had to give them quick showers when we got home, even though it was already late and past bedtime. In between keeping my eye on Samantha and Aedan, and making sure Owen didn't eat things he found on the ground or lick the fence around the field, I was able to watch Ben play some. I always enjoy watching him play softball, and I'm glad he can do something he enjoys like this with other guys from church.

I hoped so much that Monday night would be better, but the night wasn't starting off very promising, as he was already up crying a couple times even before Ben and I went to bed. He was still up multiple times throughout the night, and I fed him three of those times.

Even though we had a rough couple of days, Tuesday seemed to be a better day for Owen. He slept in until almost 9:00 that day after having a rough night, when I had to wake him up to take him to the doctor for his check-up. It was a follow-up from his ear infection, and everything looked clear, which was good. I was so glad it seemed like the ear infection was finally gone. However, we mentioned how much trouble he had been having with sleeping, waking up six times a night and not staying asleep for very long at nap time, and she didn't have much to say to us other than he must be teething and said we could give him some allergy medicine to help clear up a bit of his congestion. She also said that it can take up to six weeks after having an ear infection for the fluid to totally go away, and for the ears to feel back to normal again, even if the infection was gone. I was hoping she would be able to give us some tips on how to help him sleep better or what the cause of all this discomfort could be, but unfortunately, she didn't give us any advice. I felt pretty discouraged because I knew this meant we just had to wait this phase out, and who knows how long it will last for. I just wished there was something we could do to provide comfort to him and help him (and us) sleep more and better.

Since Owen slept in later that morning and we had the doctor appointment, I didn't get him down for a morning nap until almost 11:30. However, he ended up sleeping for an hour and fifteen minutes that morning without waking up and crying once. I was so excited that he was doing so well, and it made me feel hopeful that maybe he would start to nap better again.

Samantha and Aedan continued their morning routine of musical theater camp and VBS. They were both having a great time, and I was glad they could get out of the house and enjoy a fun activity, especially with how much I was having to deal with Owen, it wouldn't have been a very fun week for them at home. I was hoping to have some time in the mornings to get stuff done around the house while the big kids were gone, but that didn't happen because of how hard of a time I was having with Owen not napping. I felt like I was spending all morning trying to get him to sleep and then back to sleep.

Ben was able to pick up Aedan from VBS and then come home to help me out while I had another appointment at the foot doctor that afternoon. After my appointment, I was able to run some errands before going back home since Owen had taken such a late morning nap. It took a little bit of convincing to get Owen to eat and fall asleep that afternoon, but I finally got him to fall asleep, and he took another good nap without crying at all. I was able to actually get some things done around the house that I had been wanting to do for awhile, and it felt so good to have a little break, to feel productive, and not have to deal with a crying and upset baby who wasn't getting enough sleep.

There weren't enough people interested in doing small group that Tuesday night, which we were okay with. We kind of needed a relaxed evening with just our family. After dinner we decided to go down to Zak's to get our $2 ice cream that they have on Tuesdays. We walked over to the Locks to eat our ice cream and let the kids run around and play in the grass for awhile. It was a beautiful evening, and it was fun to just stand and talk with Ben while watching our kids play around in the grass. It's nights like these that remind us what we love so much about living in the U.P. The summers are beautiful up here, and they definitely make up for the long, cold winter.

I was hoping that Owen would have a better night since he had such a good day of napping, but that Tuesday night he was up crying twice in the two hours between when I put him to bed and when we started getting ready for bed ourselves. It was definitely not a good sign, and I was trying to prepare myself mentally for what might be in store for us that night. I felt like issues with Owen have been never-ending since our trip to Chicago. Before that, he was finally starting to do better about taking longer, more regular naps, but then we were out of town and that's when he developed his ear infection that never really went away for a couple weeks, then the diaper rash, then vacation with interrupted schedules, and teething all along the way. Things have been rough with Owen, and I know I talk about it a lot, but it has been pretty all-consuming to me lately. It's hard to do much of anything or to function like a normal person when you have a baby that needs to sleep but isn't. I was having so many doubts in my abilities as a mom, wondering if I was doing something wrong with Owen, if I should have tried harder to get him to take a pacifier or a bottle at the beginning, if I should have tried to train him earlier to fall asleep on his own, rather than always holding him and bouncing him on my shoulder or nursing him to sleep, so that I now have to do that all the time, except he is now almost 24 pounds, so it's much more difficult to hold him for a longer period of time. The sleep deprivation and the amount of energy it takes from me having to deal with him not sleeping, is definitely affecting other areas of my life, and I feel exhausted. Really, I can't complain too much because Ben has been great in helping me out more since his schedule is more flexible during the summer and we both know this is a difficult time with Owen. I don't know what I would do without Ben's support and without him being willing to take some of the shifts with Owen when he just won't be put down to sleep. However, then I feel bad that I'm taking him away from the work that he needs to get done because he has been home more to help me out. All this just makes me wonder how long we have to wait it out. How do I know if it's something that's just a phase, or something that we should be actively trying to work on and help him with? If any moms are reading this and have some advice for me, I would love for you to comment or message me.

Tuesday into Wednesday was another long night with Owen. He was up crying 9 times during the night, three of those times I nursed him because we didn't know what else to do. Just holding him, getting him to fall asleep on our shoulder, and laying him down, wasn't working. I knew it was going to be a long day because Ben was headed to Lansing for the day for a work trip, meaning I had to do all the dropping off, picking up, nap times, dinner, and everything by myself after feeling like I hardly slept much at all. Luckily, Samantha and Aedan were very helpful to me that morning, and I was able to get everyone dropped off on time. Since Owen had a rough night again, he ended up sleeping in until 9:00, which I will take, I'm glad for him to sleep any time he will actually sleep, but it made his morning nap a little more difficult again. I tried putting him down around 11:00, walking around and bouncing him for 25 minutes to get him to sleep, but he just cried and screamed when I laid him down. I texted Ben to see how he was doing on his drive and to let him know about Owen, and he commented that he wished this would end. Oh, how much we both wish this would end, or that there was something we could do to help him sleep better. It would feel so much different if it was either nap time or bed time that he had trouble sleeping, but it's both. Any time we try to lay him down it's a battle, it's work, and it's a constant worry about when he will wake up again and trying to get this little baby enough sleep that he is well-rested.

I hoped that he might take a good nap that afternoon since he hadn't napped that morning, but he had another rough time, only sleeping for half an hour and then woke up crying and screaming. He hadn't napped all day, and I knew he was tired, but he just wouldn't stay asleep no matter what I did. I had a hard time believing that all this trouble with sleeping could all be from teething. I was so tired and so done with dealing with him not sleeping, that I was tempted to just turn off the monitor and let him cry in his bed for awhile. I felt like I couldn't handle it anymore. I wished that he would take a pacifier, so I could at least have some kind of a break and maybe he could self-soothe sometimes. However, I know that just letting him cry wouldn't do any good, he would just keep crying and getting more and more upset. I felt so overwhelmed by it all, to the point where I am getting angry with him and don't want to go in his room and hold him and bounce him and walk around with him anymore. I just want him to sleep, I just want sleep for myself and for Ben, and I felt like it was all making me go crazy. Things have certainly been rough for our little guy lately. I love him, and I'm so glad that we have him, don't get me wrong. We tried for another baby for almost two years before we were finally blessed with him. I wouldn't change having him for anything in the world, but this phase with him is so incredibly difficult, especially with having two older kids that I feel like I'm neglecting because Owen is taking up so much of my time and effort and  mental energy. Plus, I am so tired from not sleeping much, that it is really difficult for me to be the kind of mom that I want to be. I am much less patient with the kids. I am not as fun because all the things I need to get done around the house aren't getting done because Owen isn't sleeping and giving me that time to get things done. I am also not being the kind of wife that I want to be because I feel like I don't have any time all day to get anything done or just to be by myself and recharge. Plus, with how little sleep we are getting, I feel so tired by the time the kids are in bed that I don't have much more energy for anything else. I feel overwhelmed, exhausted, and ready for a break, ready for this phase to pass, and ready for Owen's sleep to improve.

Here is Izzy enjoying some rest outside in the sun that afternoon. She has the right idea. :)

Even though Owen had only napped half an hour all day, I decided I just needed to get out of the house that evening, so I made tacos for the kids and me for dinner and then we headed over to the concert in the park. The Saline Fiddlers were going to be there, and I remembered them being pretty good last year. It is a group of high school students that play string instruments and even have a small dance floor out on the grass in front for people to dance on. We hadn't been to a concert in the park yet this year, so I was excited to spend a lovely evening outside enjoying some good music, some popcorn, and some fresh air. I figured Owen wouldn't do any worse if we were to go out, and Samantha and Aedan love to go to these concerts in the park so they can dance around to the music. It was a little more challenging taking all three kids by myself, and we were a little bit late, but we were able to carry on our chairs and gear and find a seat off to the side where there was enough space for the kids to move around and dance. I kept Owen in the stroller as long as he was content, giving him toys to play with, puffs for a snack, and his sippy cup with water that he mainly just chews on. Samantha and Aedan went back and forth between dancing to the music and coming back to eat their popcorn. After about twenty minutes or so, Ben got back from his day away in Lansing, and he decided to join us in the park as well. Sometimes we leave after the break in the middle of the set, but the big kids were doing so well and Ben had just gotten there, so we decided to stay a little longer, as long as the kids were handling it.

Owen was very interested to get out of the stroller and crawl around on the blanket, as well as investigate the chairs we had set up and the kids' water bottles. I decided to sit him up in Aedan's tiger chair, just for the fun of it, and he was so cute sitting there chewing on his water bottle. (Although, I feel like you can tell in his picture that he is tired from only napping 30 minutes all day. You can see the huge bags under his eyes.)

No sleeping and all, but isn't this boy such a little cutie?!

At one point I looked at Aedan and he had two sticks in his hands, pretending like he was playing a violin like one of the performers. It was so cute that I just had to take a video of it.

Samantha saw what I was doing and wanted to get in on it as well, so she also had to get in on the action of playing stick violin. At the end of this video, they are both playing together, and you can see the dancers in the background.

After awhile Owen was getting pretty antsy and wanted to get into things that he shouldn't, so Ben offered to push him around the park in the stroller, to give me a break, and to give Owen a change of scenery. Well, it didn't take very long before he sent me this picture of Owen fast asleep in the stroller, leaned up against the front bar. I couldn't believe he actually fell asleep like that, but I guess after only napping half an hour all day, it doesn't take much to put you to sleep. He slept like this for quite awhile, really until we started getting things packed up and ready to go back home. Poor little guy, I felt bad that he was so tired, but I just could not get him to take a decent nap that day.

Thursday was another day much like the rest of the week. Aedan went to VBS, Samantha went to musical theater camp, and I hung out with Owen. That afternoon Ben volunteered to come home and be with the kids while I attended a women's Bible study out at Brimley State Park. I was going to take the kids with me, especially since Owen hasn't been napping anyways, but Ben knew I had had a long day with the kids on Wednesday while he was gone, and he wanted me to be able to enjoy my time without having to deal with a cranky baby. Samantha was still at her camp until 3:00, so I wouldn't have been able to take her anyways since the Bible study went from 2:00-4:00. I will plan on taking them with me next time since they provide childcare.

It was getting to be a pretty warm day outside, so once Owen was up from his nap (of course Ben had to sit with him again to get him to nap), they spent quite a bit of time outside. Here are a couple pictures Ben sent me of Owen swinging and the big kids in their bathing suits, enjoying the water in the kiddie pool. They got out our water guns from our Virginia vacation, and they soaked up water from the pool to spray each other and anything else that looked interesting in the yard. I love our house, the yard, and the location. It is so wonderful to have a back yard to play in. The kids love our back yard and spend hours playing and coming up with imaginary games. Owen is also starting to enjoy being outside more. He loves to swing and being out on the grass or bear crawling across the ground or pavement doesn't bother him at all. In fact, when he hears Samantha and Aedan playing in the back yard, he makes a beeline for the patio door so that he can pull up on the screen door and make loud squawks at his older brother and sister. He doesn't understand why we don't just let him go out in yard with them all the time. :)

Thursday evening was bath/shower night, and after Samantha was done in the shower and was dressed in her matching pajamas with Kit, she got all cuddled up on the couch to read a book with her. I asked her if she was reading it out loud, and Samantha said, "No, Kit can read what's in my mind." She was too cute sitting on the couch with her doll, so I snapped a couple pictures of them together.

Friday, June 29th was Engineer's Day, which is a pretty big deal in Sault Ste. Marie. It's the only day of the year where the public is allowed to go over the locks and tour the buildings. There are thousands of people that come to Sault Ste. Marie every year for this. We missed it last year since we were on vacation, so we definitely wanted to go this year. However, with Aedan going to VBS and Samantha going to musical theater camp, they were going to be gone part of the day on Friday. We did decide to take Samantha for a little while after we dropped Aedan off at 9:00 and before she had to be at camp at 10:00. However, there was a pretty long line to get in, so she didn't get to do much except for get herself these pretty cookies shaped like Michigan and go through an obstacle course bounce house.

While Ben walked over to drop Samantha off, I walked with Owen over to the fountain area to give him a chance to crawl around. Isn't his bear crawl just great? He knows it's better to do it that way then to scrape his knees up on the ground. He so desperately wanted to get to those water fountains. He loves water, maybe even more than Samantha did, and she's always been our little fish.

Once Ben came back to the locks, we walked around, just the three of us, and it was kind of strange only having Owen. It was a flashback to our early days when we just had Samantha. Life was much simpler (and quieter) then. We were able to push Owen around in the stroller and when he got tired, I put him in the Ergo, covered up his little head, and walked around, patting his bottom until he fell asleep. Especially with how hard it has been to get him to nap, I wasn't too concerned about being out over nap time that day. Here are a couple pictures of my boy and me. :)

After walking around the locks for awhile, we headed back to where Aedan had VBS so we could watch him perform the songs he had been learning all week. He was so excited to be able to perform for us, and I love that he was standing right up in the front. He did such a great job singing and doing the motions. I think this little boy is starting to come out of his shell more now. I'm glad to see him more confident and willing to try new things on his own. "My Lighthouse" was definitely one of his favorite songs to sing.

Here are some other videos of the songs from VBS:

After watching Aedan perform, the church provided lunch for all the kids and their families, and Aedan was very excited about staying for hot dogs, chips, and ice cream. Then, we took Aedan to the Coast Guard open house for a little while because we knew he would enjoy looking at and sitting in all the vehicles and boats. It was a hot and sunny day, and was going to get up to the lower 90s, so we didn't want to spend too long outside, but we also wanted Aedan to be able to enjoy himself. Here are some pictures of Aedan from the open house.

And here's little Owen hanging out in his stroller. I tried my best to keep him in the shade as much as possible. He was a pretty happy kid, even though it was pretty hot.

When we got back home, Ben and I worked together to get our air conditioner hooked up in the living room. With how hot it was going to be over the next week, we knew we would want the air conditioner going. Plus, we figured at some point we would end up having the kids sleep in the basement when it got too hot upstairs. The air conditioner worked great at taking the humidity out of the air, and we even got a stand fan to help circulate the air. I wasn't looking forward to the heat, but I was so glad we purchased the air conditioner last fall and that we had basement to hang out in as well.

We enjoyed playing outside in the shade of the back yard that evening together. I filled up the water table for Owen to play with, although he was more interested in chewing on the little balls, trying to help his top lateral incisors break through the skin.

Samantha's first performance of Willy Wonka Jr. was that Friday night at 7:00, and we decided Ben would go Friday night and I would take Aedan on Saturday afternoon. Samantha was so excited for her first performance, although she did admit that she was a little nervous as well. She was even excited about me putting her stage make-up on before she left and couldn't stop looking at herself in the mirror. Ben said that you could tell she really enjoyed it. He even took her out for ice cream afterwards to celebrate. Here are some pictures and videos from that evening's performance.

Even Friday afternoon, Owen wouldn't stay asleep unless someone was holding him, so Ben sat down with him. He slept peacefully on his chest for a long time, but he wasn't interested in being laid down at all. I felt bad that he was stuck down in his room again, but it seemed like he was so good at getting Owen to sleep like that. I never seemed to be able to do that with Owen because it seemed like as soon as I sat down in the rocking chair, he would wake up and start squirming around. Ben must be able to hold him in a better way that allows him to be more comfortable than I can. On Friday night, we decided to keep the big kids in their rooms because it wasn't too uncomfortable yet. Especially with Owen waking up crying multiple times a night, we didn't want them to get woken up more because of him. By 11:30 that night he had already woken up five times, and Ben and were so tired of having to deal with him waking up so much at night.

Saturday was a pretty relaxing day for us. We didn't have any plans in the morning, and Owen ended up sleeping in until almost 9:00 that morning because of how much he was awake during the night. I took Samantha and Aedan on a few errands that morning, one being stopping at our local Family Video store to set up an account and let them pick out some free kids' movies to watch in the coming week. Then, we had lunch and got Samantha ready for her second performance of Willy Wonka Jr. Aedan came with me to this performance, and he was excited to get some popcorn and watch his sister perform.

Samantha was a squirrel in the nut factory, and I loved watching her. She was so expressive and so attentive to what was going on on the stage. She knew her part well and was a leader in her group. In fact, I think she even knew most of the words to the songs and even some of the lines other people were responsible for, after only one week at acting camp. I was so proud of her, and I feel like she was definitely in her element. I couldn't help but smile from ear to ear when watching her perform. A good friend of ours told us how well she did and made the comment, "I think she has a promising career ahead of her!" We will definitely have to let Samantha do more of these shows through the theater. She enjoyed herself immensely and was glad to have Aedan and I there, plus Miss Linda from church. Here are some pictures and videos of her Saturday afternoon performance. :) My little girl is getting so big and grown-up. I love watching her personality and interests develop as she learns what she likes and what she's good at.

Here's my little squirrel posing for a picture next to Charlie after her performance was over. I surprised her with a bouquet of flowers, too, which she couldn't wait to display in her room. :)

(Blog about June 24-30, 2018)