Holiday Junction & Phasing Out Samantha's Naps

Samantha: 53 Months, Week 5

Aedan: 18 Months, Week 3 (Week 81)

Both kids woke up super early on Tuesday morning, so they were pretty tired just starting out the day. It was the first day of Tot Gym at the TRI, so after getting ourselves ready, we went over there to play. It was a lot more for Aedan's benefit than Samantha's because I figured he would really enjoy running around, crawling in the tunnels, playing with the balls, and going down the slide. Most of it is a little too young for Samantha, but I figured she would find some friends that she could play with there. However, I think because it was the first one of the season, there were tons of kids there, and as a result, it was a bit overwhelming. Aedan had a hard time playing like he wanted to because other kids would take the ball he was playing with or push him out of the way when he was trying to go down the slide. Samantha really was too tired to even play and decided she would rather just sit down and eat her snack. After a while of both kids just sitting down and only being at the gym for about half an hour, I figured we should just leave since they weren't playing anyways. There was preschool story time at the library at 10:30, and we had enough time to make it there for it. Samantha liked that idea much better than staying in the gym, so we headed for the library. There were not too many kids there for story time, so it was a nice small group with Mr. Chad. Samantha really does love story time: singing songs and listening to books read aloud. Aedan did what he usually does, loving to listen and dance along to the songs but loses interest quickly when it comes to the books. I was able to amuse him in the back of the room with snacks so that he wouldn't interrupt the other kids too much. After story time I let the kids play for a little while, but they were just so tired and Samantha was getting upset and freaking out over every little thing, even while playing at the library, and she didn't want to share toys with Aedan or the other kids. So around 11:30 I decided it was time to go home so we could have lunch and get the kids down for naps.

Ben and I have been going back and forth about what to do with Samantha's naps. As I said in my last blog post, we wanted to try going a week without her napping as a trial to see if that would help her go to sleep faster at night and then ultimately get more sleep. We understood that it would be a process and that it would take some time for her body to adjust. However, since starting the experiment on Saturday, we had her nap on Sunday because she was just too tired after being woken up early, and then on Tuesday, after another day of skipping her nap on Monday, she was just too tired not to take a nap on Tuesday as well. She was overly emotional, having many outbursts of anger, and had huge bags under her eyes. I knew, especially with having community group that evening, that she wasn't going to make it without a nap, so I decided to have her take one. I didn't even stay in her room at all, and she fell right asleep. It was just so hard to know what to do because I felt like we just needed to make a decision and stick to it rather than going back and forth between napping one day and then not napping the next day. However, so far it seems like her body is just not capable of getting through the day without a rest in the middle of the afternoon.

Samantha was in much better spirits after a nap that afternoon, and we knew she would have more fun playing that evening after some good sleep. Our community group usually meets downstairs in the elementary room so that the kids can go across the hall to play once we're done eating, but those rooms were being used that evening, so we had to meet upstairs in the youth room with no extra room for the kids. So after eating dinner together, we put on a show for the kids to watch to allow for the adults to have some discussion. It worked out okay, but we were glad this was only temporary. We have all been working on finding a babysitter for the kids and have had no luck so far, even though we are willing to pay some money, no one has been willing to commit to helping every week.

Wednesday was another typical day with taking Samantha to preschool and bringing Bennett back home to play. The boys had a great time playing with blocks and puzzles, and they even discovered Roscoe's cage and had fun crawling in and out of that as well. Again though, Aedan was pretty tired and was rather clingy that morning, making it difficult to get anything done and take care of both boys. We went back to preschool early so that we could pick up Samantha and Matteo before going to the Veteran's Day in the park in Uptown Oxford. Samantha was unsure whether she wanted to even participate in this. Every time I asked her about it, she would say she didn't want to but never really had a reason. I didn't want to force her to go if she really didn't want to, but I also figured she would want to be a part of it if most other kids in her class were going to be there. I talked to Miss Betsy about it on Monday when I picked Samantha up, and she reassured Samantha that her friends would be all together and that Samantha could even stand next to Miss Betsy, if that would make her feel better.

So, we got to the park and all the preschool kids were just running around and playing on the statues while they waited for the ceremony to start. Miss Betsy lined them all up, and they waited patiently until it was their turn. They went up in front of the people gathered and led us in the Pledge of Allegiance. I was too far away to really see Samantha and how she did, but I know that she knows every word of the pledge because once we got back in the car afterwards, she was trying to get Aedan to put his hand over his heart and recite the words as well. I think she was glad that she decided to do it with all of her friends. She even remarked afterwards, "I was so brave that I didn't even have to stand next to Miss Betsy!"

After getting home later than usual, we had a quick lunch and then got ready for nap time. Here are some pictures of Aedan playing before I put him down for his nap that afternoon. I was entering a contest for some cloth diapers if I posted a picture of Aedan in one, so I decided to snap a few pictures of Aedan.

I was finally able to get a smile out of him once I turned the camera around the other direction so that he could see himself.

I decided to let Samantha just have quiet time again because Ben and I decided we just needed to stick to it and try to let her body adjust to getting all her sleep at night. However, around dinnertime it gets hard for Samantha to handle herself. Also, when she is tired she tends to want to play by herself more often and is a lot less willing to let Aedan join her. However, Aedan doesn't understand this and loves to play with her, which then causes strife in our home, particularly in the evening when I'm trying to get dinner ready. Samantha doesn't want to play with Aedan, and Aedan is very needy at this time of day, but I can't play with him or hold him very easily when I am trying to make dinner myself and have it ready for when Daddy gets home. Anyways, that evening, since Samantha ate a good dinner, she wanted to have a Popsicle for dessert before Daddy had to leave for Bible study. Samantha sat down on the rug by the sink, so of course Aedan had to copy her. Aedan was so excited when we got the Popsicle box out of the freezer that he was practically jumping up and down. Ahh, it's the little things that make life good. :)

On Thursday I decided to take the kids to the Cincinnati Museum Center because we hadn't been there in a long time. They have a holiday train exhibit, and I thought it would be fun to see. We arrived a little after 10:30 and decided to go straight to Holiday Junction since it's something we've never seen before. It was a whole new area of the museum that they only open up at Christmas time, and it was so fun to look around. The Christmas train displays were very elaborate with lots of little details to spot. It reminded me a lot of the train displays at EnterTRAINment Junction.

They even had a small train for kids to ride. Since we were members, we got tokens for them to ride. Both kids were SO excited to ride on the train together, especially just the two of them, without me. At first Samantha was sitting across from Aedan, but then she decided to sit next to him so that she could hold on to him and make sure he stayed seated. It was difficult to get a good picture as they were much too interested in ringing the bell and looking at all the fun Christmas decorations, but I think that Samantha probably sat and held his waist for the entire ride. She is such a great, attentive, loving big sister, the best a little boy could ask for.

After riding on the train, they played with some train sets that were set up, and then we discovered these talking reindeer named Patter and Pogie. They were mechanical, and I'm guessing the people operating them were sitting behind the black screens of the little barn because the reindeer would talk as if they could the kids sitting out in the audience. Aedan was a little unsure of them, staying back a little distance. Samantha thought they were pretty interesting and even tried to talk to them. However, she was too quiet for them to hear and then when they asked her to repeat herself, she was too shy to say it again. They had a 30 minute long show that we could have come back for, but I think the five minutes we caught at the end of this show was enough for my kids. Samantha wanted me to take her picture with the talking reindeer at the end, and Aedan was too interested in them to turn around.

After getting our fill of the Christmas area, we went to the Children's Museum section. Samantha wanted to climb in The Woods area first, so that's where we went. She just loves to climb, and there are lots of fun climbing features in this area. The only problem is that Aedan wants to join in as well, but he is too little to climb in a lot of the places without my help. There is a small toddler/preschooler area with a tunnel and a large rope net that looks like a spiderweb. He enjoyed climbing on that a couple times but then wanted to wander elsewhere. I didn't want to make Samantha move on early, so I told her I was just going to go right into the next room to let Aedan play in the water. The museum was not very busy that day, so it didn't worry me. She's good about getting my attention every once in awhile so that I always know where she is. I got Aedan a smock to put on, and he played in the water, splashing around for awhile. However, he then began scooping out the water with his hands to drink it, and that's when I gave him a warning about stopping. He just continued to try to drink the water, probably because I told him no and that made him want to do it even more since that's the kind of child he is right now. He just wouldn't stop, so I eventually just had to take him away from the water area and back to The Woods with Samantha.

I let Samantha play for awhile longer in The Woods before I decided it was time for lunch since it was close to noon. I planned on buying a couple slices of pizza to have along with the bananas I brought from home. The kids always love pizza, and we didn't have much food at home for me to make a picnic lunch since I go shopping on Fridays and that leaves us pretty wiped out come Thursdays. Lunch was going fine, and we were having a good time together. I wanted Aedan to take a nap at home, so I wasn't planning on staying at the museum all afternoon, but I was going to give them at least another hour or so after lunch to play. However, our plans changed.

Samantha likes to sit in photo booths for some reason, so I let her do this as we were cleaning up our lunch trash. When I went to get her so that we could go play somewhere else in the museum (not something you'd think would make a kid upset), she gently swatted at me, like she was trying to hit me. Well, I decided to give her a small time out for trying to hit me. (We are really trying to nip this in the bud because she is doing it more and more, and now Aedan is copying her and has started doing it as well. For all the wonderful things he mimics, this is one we'd like to avoid if possible.) Then she really got upset when I was trying to give her a time out, she almost just sat right down, but then decided to come at me and hit me really right in the side. At that point, she was in big trouble with me, taking something that wasn't even a problem and escalating it to be a big deal. She was acting very tired and irrational, and after hitting me like that, I wasn't sure what to do, if I should put my foot down and let her suffer the consequences of her actions by going home, or if just getting a time out and a stern talking to would be enough punishment. We hadn't played that much at the museum yet, and they were having a good time. We made the trip all the way there and had just bought lunch, so I felt like it would be just a waste of a trip if we left right then. I also thought it was unfair to Aedan to have to leave because of his sister acting up, but then at the same time, he doesn't really know or care at this point. After talking to Ben, I decided it would be best just to leave, to prove a point that she can't act disrespectful like that and still get what she wants, and also just because she was so tired.

Since we have tried to get her adjusted to not napping, it seems like she's had a difficult time handling her emotions. She will fly off the handle much more easily, and it seems like the whole day after she doesn't nap is terrible. She had huge bags under her eyes. I was really disappointed with how the morning went and always feel bad when stuff like this happens, like I'm a failure as a mom, that I make Samantha do things she doesn't want to do, or that she doesn't like to spend time with me as much as with Ben or others, or that I just don't know how to handle her and help her deescalate her emotions. I don't like how tired she's been lately, and it seems like no matter what we do, whether we let her nap or not nap, she is just operating with a lack of sleep. I just hope that this all gets easier once her body adjusts to not napping and getting all of her sleep at night. I want to have fun with Samantha and not have every interaction with her be a negative one. Sometimes I just really miss my little girl. She's becoming more independent, not needing me as much, enjoying playing on her own more, and sometimes Aedan seems to dominate so much of my time because he's little and needs more from me. But I have to admit, I miss my Samantha.

Friday was a pretty normal day with dropping Samantha off at preschool, taking Aedan grocery shopping, unloading and putting away the groceries, and then playing with Aedan at home. I have found that I am really enjoying our Fridays together. On Wednesdays I have both Aedan and Bennett, but Friday is my only day of the week with just Aedan by himself. It's fun to show him one-on-one attention without feeling like I am neglecting Samantha by just playing with him. Aedan is a fun kid and has a great personality. As I was sorting laundry, he started playing a game where he would push a toy with one hand, knock it into something, and then tip it over. When it tipped over, he would come running back to me with a sad face, crawl into my lap, sit for a few seconds, and then get up and go back to his toy, pushing it again. He did this over and over many times. This reminded me of another game he started this past week where he would gently hit me with hands, and I would laugh and say, "Ow, ow, ow ow, etc." Then he would stop and make a whiny "Mmm.." sound with a sad face, and that would be my cue to pretend to cry, after which he would lean in and give me a hug. Then the whole game would start over again. He thought it was hilarious and wanted to keep pretending like this over and over again. It's the simple things that entertain him, and I love it.

Fridays are Daddy's lunch dates with the kids while I go to Zumba. He picks Samantha up from preschool and then brings them back to his office for lunch. They don't always eat the best, but they really enjoy being in Daddy's office and then going up to talk to the office ladies as well as play around in one of the classrooms. Plus, Samantha gets a root beer candy from one of the office ladies, so that's a plus as well.

The rest of the weekend went by fairly uneventfully, which is not a bad thing. To me, weekends are all about good family time, and we tend to be a little more low-key after the busyness of the week. Since Samantha has not been napping, we have been putting her to bed earlier at night, meaning she's in bed before 8:00 so that way she can fall asleep at a decent time. That's a benefit for Ben and me as well because then both kids are asleep earlier than usual, giving Ben and me more time together at night. We like to watch shows together like Amazing Race on Friday nights, and I also checked out the BBC version of Pride and Prejudice, so we have been watching that a little at a time over the last week or so. I have a great husband to be willing to watch over five hours of British shows with me, simply because he loves me and knows I enjoy sitting next to him on the couch with his arm wrapped around me. There's no better way to end a day. :)

On Saturday morning Samantha had an exciting event planned. Matteo invited Samantha over to his house for a play date, and she was super excited. It was going to be just her, neither of us would stay, and most importantly, Aedan wouldn't be there either. She made sure to rub it in Aedan's face that she was going somewhere without him, and that she was looking forward to it. I dropped her off at 10:00, and they had a great time playing together. They helped Andrea make brownies, played outside on the play set, saw their chickens, and Samantha even convinced Matteo to play dolls with her. It was nice of them to have Samantha over, and I was glad that she could have something special like that, just for her. They were saying Matteo was feeling a little left out lately and needed something special just for him as well.

It was strange being home with just Ben and Aedan. We had forgotten how much more you can talk to each other when just with a toddler who doesn't talk much yet. Ben and I were actually able to carry on a conversation while we were playing with Aedan. Also, I was able to start cleaning the house some, since Ben was there to entertain Aedan. I have gotten to the point now where I pretty much have to leave cleaning as a weekend endeavor. It is impossible to clean the house when I am home alone with Samantha and Aedan, and if I only cleaned during nap time it would take me all week and every nap time, which is not my idea of a good time. So, I must take advantage of having Ben around to help out more with the kids while I clean the bathrooms, dust, vacuum, and mop. I don't enjoy cleaning, but like it a lot more when I get it all done in one fell swoop.

Even though Samantha was really tired on Saturday afternoon, we stuck with our plan and decided to continue with Samantha doing quiet time rather than napping. We wanted to try it consistently for a week, to really give it a fair shot and see if her body starts to adjust better the longer we do it. However, it's still really hard because she gets so tried around 1:00 every afternoon. She really enjoys playing in her room, though, and does a really good job having quiet time for an hour and fifteen minutes every day. She never tries to come out early, and she usually stays fairly quiet so as not to disturb Aedan while he naps. It's always fun to see what things she decides to play with once her quiet time is over. I'm really enjoying how her imagination has taken off lately in how she's finding creative ways to play with her toys. She has really enjoyed her Legos and has built some great castles and fences for ponies. Her Lego people interact with her fairies and her ponies. Her Barbies get ready and go all sorts of places together. She really enjoys this quiet time to play on her own without having her pesky little brother around, and I think it helps her introverted personality to have this built in alone time every day. Sometimes it takes some work to get her to clean up all the toys she played with during quiet time, but so far it's been good for her.

Aedan did not nap on Saturday afternoon for some reason. He fell asleep in the car with Daddy on the way to pick up Samantha from Matteo's house, and I can't imagine that would have messed up his ability to nap, but he just was not having it that day. Ben put him down for his nap, and he was quiet for awhile, but then started talking and making noise. Ben went up to his room and discovered he had a dirty diaper, so he changed him and then tried rocking him again to get him to sleep. He clearly was tired since he fell asleep so easily in the car. However, Aedan fell asleep in his arms and stayed asleep for quite some time but then woke up as soon as Ben laid him down. We gave him some time to try to calm down, but we knew that us going in his room again would not help in getting him to sleep. We had plans to go shopping at Once Upon a Child that evening, so once Samantha's quiet time was over, we decided to just get Aedan up and leave earlier than we had planned so that way we could get both kids in bed earlier that night.

There were several things we needed to go shopping for, especially in preparing for winter and colder weather arriving soon. We needed a winter coat and snow pants for Samantha, as well as snow boots, hats, and gloves for both Samantha and Aedan. I also wanted to get a few more long sleeve shirts for Samantha and a bigger size shoe for Aedan. It seems like he has grown quite a bit lately, and his 4.5 size shoes no longer fit him. I found some nice 5.5 Stride Rite shoes for a good price. We got all those things for around $65, and it made me wonder why anyone would shop for kids' clothes at a regular department store. We find so many good things at Once Upon a Child, and kids go through clothes and shoes so quickly, it's hardly worth paying full price. Anyways, after making our purchases, we ate dinner at Noodles and Company before stopping at Walmart for a few other things like new socks for Samantha, before heading back home for bedtime. Both kids were extremely tired, especially Aedan since he didn't nap at all that afternoon and he usually naps anywhere from 2 1/2 to 3 hours every day. Both kids were in bed and asleep before 8:00 that night. They did pretty well running errands with us, even though they were tired. I had thought about going by myself with the kids earlier in the week, but it would have been really difficult to corral them both while also trying to find specific items and have them try things on. I was grateful for Ben's assistance.

Sunday morning we were off to church for the 9:00 service. We hoped that Aedan would do better this week in the toddler room since we were only staying for one service. However, he cried when we dropped him again, even though I tried walking in with him to get him involved with toys before making a break for it. As we walked away, we saw the Burdettes in the nursery room, and they asked, "Is that Aedan crying?" I explained how he had a hard time last week since he was there for both services, and I think he remembers, so those feelings carried over to this week. He's been going through more separation anxiety lately, crying when people leave him, especially when I leave him. Sarah agreed to check on him for us and make sure he didn't stay upset for too long. I was worried about Aedan for most of the service, hoping that he wasn't having too hard of a time downstairs. When we went back down to pick up the kids, Aedan was being held and was crying again. They said that he didn't cry for too long at the beginning, and he just started getting upset again a few minutes ago when seeing other kids getting picked up. The rest of the time he did great, so I think he is just going through a little separation anxiety right now. I remember Samantha went through a similar phase as this when she was Aedan's age where she would cry every time we dropped her off on Sunday mornings. However, it didn't last too long, and she grew out of it, so I'm sure the same will be true for Aedan. It's funny all the different phases kids go through and how you have to adapt in different ways according to the different stages.

Blog about November 10-16, 2015